I’ve Got Good News (and Bad News)
- Posted on June 30, 2006
- Viewed 186 times
- (6) comments
Good News: You baptised seven people today in the river.
Bad News: You lost two of them in the swift current.
Good News: The women’s group voted to send you a get-well card.
Bad News: The vote passed by 31-30.
Good News: The pastor-parish relations committee accepted your job description the way you wrote it.
Bad News: They were so inspired by it that they asked the bishop to send a new minister capable of filling the position.
Good News: The trustees finally voted to add more church parking.
Bad News: They are going to blacktop the front lawn of the parsonage.
Good News: Church attendance rose dramatically the last three weeks.
Bad News: You were on vacation.
Good News: Your biggest critic just left your community.
Bad News: He has been appointed as your conference bishop.
Good News: The youth of the church came to your house for a visit.
Bad News: It was in the middle of the night and they were armed with toilet paper and shaving cream.
Good News: The Church Council has agreed to send you to the Holy Land for study.
Bad News: They are waiting for war to breakout before sending you.
You've always heard the expression, "Well, I've got good news and bad news". Here's some good news / bad news if you're a pastor. See if you can relate!
Comments
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Luke Camara on Fri, June 30, 2006
Good News: Your Sermons are being used as case studies in Seminary Preaching Classes.
Bad News: They are examples of how not to preach
Jeff on Fri, June 30, 2006
Good News - The church board has finally decided to give you that sabatical…
Bad News - Their only expectation is that you will use the time to interview at other churches.
Bad News - The weekly giving has dropped by $100.
Good News - That drop is the result of you not signing your paycheck back over to the church.
Peter Hamm on Fri, June 30, 2006
Good news - The one kid in the youth group who has created the most problem and been arrested the most times has FINALLY given his life to Christ one day before he graduated.
Bad news - It’s your son.
todd erskine on Fri, June 30, 2006
The good news is that everyone in the church loves you!
The bad news is that the only ones left are your wife and kids, and even they are thinking of leaving.
The Thief on Sat, July 01, 2006
“Good News: The trustees finally voted to add more church parking.
Bad News: They are going to blacktop the front lawn of the parsonage.”
Yeah, laugh it up. That very nearly happened to us last year!
Jim on Mon, July 10, 2006
Clues that tell a A pastor that he may be in trouble
1. He is asked to work in jr Church
2. He is given Sundays off
3. He is asked to be on the churches Pastoral search committee
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