Monday Morning Insights

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    To All Non-Church-Attending Christian Men:  We Apologize

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    Dear Mr. Christian non-churchgoer,

    We want to start by telling you we have been wrong about you. We have mistreated you and maligned you. We have cooperated in the HomerSimpsonizing you have suffered in our culture because we have done no better in the church. We have encouraged your wife to browbeat you into coming to church.
    We have shanghaied you into attending “youth functions” and “kids programs”
    as a way of getting you to join our mealymouthed assembly. We have indeed asked for money every time the doors were open, and we have offered services not commensurate with what we have been demanding in payment.

    In short, Mr. Christian non-churchgoer, we have defrauded you along with your entire gender. We are sorry.

    Let me repeat that.

    We are sorry, and we promise we will never again do those things to you, to your family, to your pocketbook. We will never teach your wife the strategies and secrets to “getting your husband to church.” We will never again put down women whose husbands are not present or make a big deal of those women who have successfully dragged their men to church.

    Oh, and by the way, when you got screwed over by a “brother” in the church and we looked the other way; we are sorry about that, too. We will never again allow one of our members to get away with such behavior. Membership in our church will never again mean you can rip off other members and get off scot-free.

    So, Mr. Chrisian non-churchgoer, we are ready to offer you a new deal. In this deal, we promise not to teach that “the devil is going to whoop up on you if you don’t pay your tithe.” We won’t frighten your wife into demanding that you tithe. We will not even mention the tithe except one Sunday a year, and even then, we will advertise it well in advance. You can just skip that Sunday. If God is not asking you to tithe, we won’t either. God loves a cheerful giver.

    Please forgive us for our many sins against you, against your family, and ultimately against the God we have been claiming to serve. Please forgive us, and if you find it in your heart to do so, please come and join us at __________(insert address here)

    Most sincerely,

    Pastor ____________

    FOR DISCUSSION: Your thoughts?

    I received an email from Mike Ellis at the Church for Men in Florida recently. He forwarded this letter that they have written apologizing to non-church-attending men for the way the church has treated them over the years. Take a read and tell me what you think...

    Comments

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    1. Peter Hamm on Tue, June 05, 2007

      And we will be authentic and real and genuine and fun instead of boring and judgemental and drab and obnoxious…

    2. Camey on Tue, June 05, 2007

      WAIT! I’m confused. Is the letter written to non-Christian men? or Christian men non-churchgoers? I think it is the latter.


      I’d like to hear Mike’s expanded thoughts on “We will never teach your wife the strategies and secrets to “getting your husband to church.” We will never again put down women whose husbands are not present or make a big deal of those women who have successfully dragged their men to church.” 


      Mike????

    3. Mike Ellis on Tue, June 05, 2007

      This letter is written to Christian men who are not going to church. This letter is written to Christian men who attend Lowes, Home Depot, Denny’s and WalMart on Sunday mornings instead of church. This letter is written to Christian men who do NOT wake up on Sunday mornings and say, “Hey, let’s go to church!”


      The women who go to church on Sundays?.....“Hey, Paula….great work! Ya finally got Mr. Recliner to come to church with you! Ha, Ha, Ha!”


      “So Paula, where’s ole Mr Sinner? Laying on the recliner watching Nascar again?”


      “Hey Paula, tell your husband that we have shortened our sermons. They are now 2 hours instead of 3 hours. That will bring him in.”


      Hey Paula, new worship song this Sunday. It’s called “I’m madly in love with you”. We’re only going to say, “I’m madly in love with you” 4 times instead of 8 times when we are singing. That will bring your husband in.”

    4. Camey on Tue, June 05, 2007

      Thanks Mike for taking the time to reply. I know many men like you described and their wives as well.


      You’ve helped given me some new perspective that I will pass on to those that I speak to and those that I train to lead women. Please know that I am continuing to pray for you and the church there.


      Camey

    5. Ken on Tue, June 05, 2007

      How do you establish who the recipients are?  Are you sending these to the husbands of women attending church without them?  Not a bad approach for that group, but I think it would be difficult to isolate that demographic, at least in large numbers.  Just my $.02.

    6. Mike Ellis on Tue, June 05, 2007

      This would work best as a radio ad or a newspaper ad.

    7. Melody on Tue, June 05, 2007

      I can’t imagine actually sending this to specific unchurched men, but it’s excellent as a viral e-mail or in an church newsletter.  In fact, I think it’s probably largely directed to the churches and their leaders.   Very clever humor piece, with a lot of truth in it.

    8. shadowette on Tue, June 05, 2007

      I like the idea of a full page newspaper ad in the Sunday morning paper.  Probably when you’ll find most of this demographic reading the paper at home while their wives are at church.

    9. Tim on Wed, June 06, 2007

      Sorry, I’d like to be there, but my religion kicks off most Sunday mornings at 11 a.m.

    10. dpastordan on Wed, June 06, 2007

      Apology?  Why?  Just get on their wavelength… Like…


      Dear Bubba,


      A coupla guys and I are getting together next Sunday afternoon at my house for a Barbeque.  Bring your favorite soda or chips.  O, bring your trunks.  My pool is filled. 


      The wives and kids are going shopping for a few hours.  I have an old jalopy I’m considering giving to the church youth group for the road rally.  If you have any ideas on fixing it up, I’m open to ideas. 


      O, congratulations on making Fireman of the year.  Way to go bro!


      Later!


      The Preacher Guy

    11. Matt on Tue, June 12, 2007

      I liked it all the way up to, “If God is not asking you to tithe, we won’t either.”  I get your point but I don’t see an exception in God’s word to tithe.  I believe that tithing is a general revelation to all Christ followers, not just ones who get “spoken to”.  Also, to suggest that men could skip that Sunday, you must not be preaching biblical stewardship in a relevant contemporary way where men wouldn’t feel threatened, especially “Christian” men.  Our men love our stewardship series because we make it fun.  Last year we did “faith factor”.  We brought in a tank of scorpions and had people grab money from them.  People actually did it!  A nice lead in to what people will do for more money - grab from a scorpion or recieve God’s blessing.


      Also, if you are a “Non-Churched Christain” where does the fact that you follow Christ yet don’t belong to His church play into this thing?  I hear many people not involved in a local church who are “Christians”.  Just an interesting thought.

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