Monday Morning Insights

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    When You Get a Raw Deal…

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    To help us, we will turn to the Psalms, where the raw emotions of real people who just hit the wall are expressed, and where deep reservoirs of truth are found that can help you through.  And what we’ll see is that just when we think God is nowhere to be found, GOD IS CLOSER THAN YOU THINK.

    We’re kicking this study off on a bruising, but all-too-common experience that can leave your teeth on edge and bitterness in your heart. Psalm 73 is our passage and the title is “When You Get a Raw Deal.” Anybody here know what I’m talking about? When you did the right thing, but got the back of the hand anyway. Have you ever been betrayed? Ever been gossiped about? Who did you in financially? Who put the screws to you? Who did something unfair to you at work? Maybe it happened at home with a parent or grandparent, your husband or wife or best friend.

    If you’ve ever had something happen to you that was out of human control but seemed so unfair that you don’t understand how a good God could let it happen, then you need to sit awhile with a choir director named Asaph. Asaph was one of three directors who worked under King David. He was one of the great worship leaders in the OT. And he’s about to get as real as it gets.

    Asaph’s Raw Deal

    Take a look at v. 1: “God is indeed good to Israel, to the pure in heart.” Asaph is acknowledging what Hebrews 11:6 names as the very essence of faith. “Now without faith it is impossible to please God, for the one who draws near to Him must believe that He exists and rewards those who seek Him.” Asaph believes God exists, that He is good and sovereign over all. I like Asaph already.

    But Asaph is in trouble. In v. 2, he says, “But as for me, my feet almost slipped; my steps nearly went astray.” “I nearly lost my grip on what I believe. I tripping over something that just doesn’t make sense! It’s not fair.”

    This God-inspired worship leader is ready to walk away. He’s on the edge of throwing in the towel. And he doesn’t keep the cause of his troubles a secret. Look at v. 3: “For I was envious of the arrogant when I saw the prosperity of the wicked.” Asaph had been checking out the people playing for the other team. He was watching how the ungodly were getting along. He probably didn’t do this purposefully at the beginning. Maybe he was sitting at the doctor’s office one day and started thumbing through a magazine that featured celebrity homes. Or maybe he does business with an ungodly person in town who seems to have the Midas touch. I don’t know how it started. I just know that suddenly, Asaph started paying attention, and his confusion deepened.

    To get insight into Asaph’s struggle here, notice four key words in v. 3. Two of the words refer to the people he had been tracking. They are arrogant and wicked, he said. Arrogant refers to people who make sure people notice them and what they have. They make sure the cameras are clicking and the interviewers are there to fawn over them. Wicked emphasizes the guilt of those who are actively choosing that which is offensive to God. Asaph has his eye on the celebrities of his day, the Donald Trumps and Lindsey Lohans who openly disdain God.

    Now get ready for the stinger. The third word we need to see became a private obsession for this worship leader: it was the prosperity these God-rejecters enjoyed. The Hebrew word for prosperity is shalom. Recognize it? It literally means peace with God such that your life is fulfilled, tranquil, and complete.

    Asaph looked at the lifestyles, the cars, the clothing, the houses they lived in, the company they kept, and thought to himself: “They’re getting everything God promised to His covenant people! I don’t go to the clubs, I maintain all this discipline and for what? They are the blessed, not me. I thought you reap what you sow! God, I’m getting a raw deal!”

    Asaph had fallen into the trap of loving the world and the things that are in the world. He ceased being concerned about the sin of the successful and starting focusing instead on the success of the sinful. And that lead him to the fourth word we need to see in v. 3: envy. “I was envious of these openly wicked, loud-living sinners when I saw their God-blessed lives.”

    Envy is the tendency to compare yourself with someone else in a way that leaves you feeling deprived. Envy means “I want what you have.” Asaph was eaten up with it. It’s not difficult for that to happen, by the way. Our culture in America is uniquely designed to create inevitable comparison and inevitable dissatisfaction. Whether it’s standardized tests, beauty contests, and your neighbor’s new dress, we are all encouraged to envy. Envy is so common that God made it the subject of one of His 10 commandments: “Do not covet your neighbor’s house. Do not covet your neighbor’s wife, his male or female slave, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor.” (Exodus 20:17)

    Asaph had let envy in the door, and now it colored everything he saw. In v. 4-12, he breaks down what he had observed. If you’ll allow me to paraphrase it, it goes like this: “So this is how life really works! These godless people, they live on easy street! They don’t face the hardships I face. They live longer, play more, and get away with everything. They wear a power-hungry, cutthroat, cynical attitude like a coat. They are self-promoting, anti-God, and worldly, and they are the ones that are getting a slice of the pie, not me.

    “You try to honor God and stay humble and do good, you’ll have a tough, mediocre life. You live by lust, power, greed, and deceit, and you become a celebrity. “God is good to … the pure in heart’? Hah.” He tells it all in v. 13: Did I purify my heart and wash my hands in innocence for nothing?”

    Can you connect with any of these feelings? Do you ever think to yourself, “Does it pay to serve God? I try to be faithful and do right, and I have to fight for every inch. It’s all backwards.” Why do dictators, child molesters, and corporate raiders get off easy? Why do violence-endorsing rap singers, arrogant executives, and God-mocking people get their own TV shows? Why is God blessing them instead of judging them?”

    Maybe you’re still struggling with the injustice you’ve been dealt and you’ve felt your commitment to God wane because of it. Before you bail out on God, Asaph wants to sit with him and learn from his experiences. Consider this godly guidance when you get a raw deal.

    1. Pour Your Heart Out to God.

    This psalm is a brutally honest confessional, from the heart of Asaph to the God he felt had given him a rip off. He took his doubts and confusion to God in prayer. He didn’t pretend everything was okay. He did what Job did. Job was a righteous man who lost all his children, his possessions, and his health. In Job 29-31, this broken man struggles with the raw deal he received. He wrestles with the tension of holding onto God’s goodness and sovereignty while dealing the tragedies he was experiencing. And through it all, he stayed real with God. “God I’m so angry! I don’t understand what is happening or why! I want answers, God.” There is no record that God ever rebuffs Job for being honest.

    In fact, God offers this invitation in Isaiah 43:26: “Take Me to court; let us argue our case together. State your [case], so that you may be vindicated.” Psalm 145:18 adds that “the Lord is near to all who call on Him, to all who call on Him in truth.” (ESV)

    God is big enough to take your anger, your pain, and your questions. So go ahead, tell Him about it. Don’t keep those emotions cooped up inside you, building layers of resentment and hardship between you and God. Stored up anger vents itself in headaches, ulcers, bitterness, resentment, private rehearsals of the injustice you’ve experienced, and outbursts of anger that are disconnected from the real problem. Unload that acid. God is waiting to talk with you.

    2. Weigh Your Choices Carefully.

    In v. 12-14, Asaph’s envy had so taken his heart that he was fed up with living a godly life. He was angry and disillusioned. Still, in v. 15, he stops to consider the impact his next steps will have: “If I had said, ‘I will speak thus,’ I would have betrayed your children.” Asaph realized that if he went public with his inner struggles, letting his cynicism and anger out in words, he would become a tool of Satan’s for the ruin of God’s people.

    How many rash words and unsifted actions have we wished to take back because of the negative consequences they brought about? We do things that brought regret and heartache because we didn’t stop to consider the consequences of our words and choices. Asaph paused to realize that his decisions will have ripple effects on others. I would urge you to follow his example, tracing the results your words and actions have on your family, friends, lost acquaintances, and church.

    3. Get the Big Picture.

    Here is where Asaph’s perspective is expanded. Listen to his words in v. 16-17:  “When I tried to understand all this, it was oppressive to me till I entered the sanctuary of God; then I understood their final destiny.” Asaph went to “church.” He brought his confusion under the truth of God. As long as Asaph tried to reason his way out of his troubled perception apart from God, he would hit his head against the wall. “It was oppressive to me,” he said. The envy he had of the wicked was like blinders to his eyes. All he could only see their immediate pleasure.

    But in worship we see from God’s infinite perspective. You can sense this music director’s relief when he comes to worship. Everything changed. In the sanctuary God was his focus, not his problems. There he was reminded of God’s attributes, character and power. He could see both God’s judgment of sin as well as God’s solution offered to sinners. Eternity broke into his temporal perspective.

    Verses 17b-19 show us that Asaph was now seeing things differently. “Then I understood their final destiny. Surely You place them on slippery ground; You cast them down to ruin. How suddenly are they destroyed, completely swept away by terrors! Their prosperity is only temporary. They enjoy their sin for a time, perhaps from a human perspective for a lifetime. But from the perspective of eternity, from the point of view in worship, there is a quick ride to the bottom. Asaph realized that “the world and its desires pass away, but the man who does the will of God lives forever.” (1 John 2:17) God completely controls their destiny, not them. And their end will be terrible.

    4. Renew Your Relationship With God.

    Armed with a new perspective about God and this world, Asaph also sees himself clearly. Envy had poisoned him and had powerful effects on him. Listen to his confession in v. 21ff.: “When my heart was grieved and my spirit embittered, I was senseless and ignorant; I was a brute beast before you.” God, I was like an animal. What does he mean by this? Well have you ever watched your dog? Rover is only concerned with the immediate. He’s not thinking about tomorrow. His big concern is immediate gratification. Asaph confessed his self-pitying, self-centered bent. And then, in worship, he renews his relationship in praise:

    Yet I am always with you; You hold me by my right hand. You guide me with Your counsel,
    and afterward You will take me into glory.  Whom have I in heaven but You? And earth has nothing I desire besides You.  My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. Those who are far from You will perish; You destroy all who are unfaithful to You. But as for me, it is good to be near God. I have made the Sovereign LORD my refuge; I will tell of all your deeds.

    Asaph takes his raw deal to the right place and finds out that he didn’t have it bad after all. With an eternal perspective, everything looks different. God wants to do that for you.

    This is just part one of a series over at LifeWay.com.  If you’re dealing with these types of issues, head over and read more...

    FOR DISCUSSION:  What’s the rawest deal you’ve ever been served up in ministry?  How did you deal with it?

    Lloyd Stilley writes, "What do you do when with your theology clashes with reality? How do you hold to the conviction that God is good when life stinks? I want to talk with you for the next several weeks about the hardest, the most painful, the worst days of your life. We’re going to say the things that sometimes go unsaid about our struggles, our depressions, when we feel so alone and have no ready answers..."

    Comments

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    1. Camey on Thu, December 20, 2007

      Good stuff here. Definitely passing this one on. Know many many individuals who are going through difficult/raw times right now all over the US.


      Thanks, Todd.

    2. Dan on Thu, December 20, 2007

      Good sermon…but where is Jesus?

    3. Jan on Thu, December 20, 2007

      What’s the rawest deal in ministry?


      Hmmmm… I have several.  Not sure I want to go there!


      But I will say that God was always there and that endurance did have it’s “perfect result” .


      Our faith was tested and it’s true that the “wounded healer” is a better minister.

    4. Brian on Fri, December 21, 2007

      I love using the Psalms when talking with people who are angry or have questions about “life being fair.”


      David was like, “Hey God, here I am, doing what You want, leading the nation, trying to be a guy after Your own heart, and what do I get in return?  My own son trying to kill me and take over the kingdom!  What’s going on here?  I don’t get it.  But I understand that You are God and I’m not.  So in spite of my not understanding what’s happening, I’m going to trust You.  Help me to rely on You.”


      Dan, as for “where is Jesus?” it could be that it’s not the entire sermon (I didn’t go to the link).  Or it could be that he’s concentrating on the teaching of the Psalm, which doesn’t mention Christ.  It could also be that an invitation was given that wasn’t formally part of the sermon itself.  Or given the context in which the sermon was delivered, it’s possible that those in attendance know that he consistently points to Christ as the solution, and so it didn’t have to be mentioned explicitly in every message.


      Brian L

    5. mark on Thu, December 27, 2007

      I found out that my Christian girlfriend of a few months was rummaging through my mail and personal letters and reporting what she found to the elders of my church.  One of the elders called me up one day and said that he wanted to talk to me about some friends of mine that he learned about who he thinks might be “inappropriate” for a church going Christian.  I will always wonder if it was my girlfriend’s idea to rummage through my belongings behind my back or if someone in the church put her up to it.


      Thanks to that experience, I decided to keep my friends and consider my relationship with church as “inappropriate”. I no longer date Christian women and I don’t bother going to church anymore.


      Can anyone top that outrageous experience?

    6. Peter Hamm on Fri, December 28, 2007

      Mark,


      Your reaction might have been a little over-the-top, but as a believer, I go out of my way to hang out with people who some Christians think i shouldn’t. Sounds a lot like what Jesus did. What your church and your girlfriend did was ridiculous, from what I can see.


      Please don’t give up on church. Just find one that isn’t so messed up. They’re out there.

    7. Mark on Fri, December 28, 2007

      Peter, here is a follow up set of questions for you professional church types concerning the church caught in the act of violating the trust of its members.


      1. What responsibility does a typical Christian have when they realize they are part of a gossip chain involving people who are rummaging though the private belongings of others?


      2. In light of the long dark history of Christian leaders caught monitoring, controlling and manipulating their church members, should a normal healthy church take any extra steps beyond that expected of a private individual when there has been a significant violation of a member’s trust or should they just ignore the violation and hope the problem goes away?

    8. Peter Hamm on Fri, December 28, 2007

      Mark,


      I only know your side of the story, but based on that.


      1. I’d bring it up to my pastor. If he was part of the problem or unresponsive, I believe I would shake the dust from my sandals and leave.


      2. The violation should, of course, NOT be ignored. Those who have betrayed trust should be confronted in love, ideally with the presence of the one whose trust has been violated, although at the first meeting, that might be, understandably, uncomfortable for the injured party.


      Having said that, what if the situation was a wife (or girlfriend) rummaging through the closet of a full-blown alcoholic to, in love, confront him and perhaps change a course of events that would eventually be self-destructive?


      Like I said, I’ve only heard your side of the story, but I stand by my general answers above. It sounds like you may have been hurt by people who are, imho, not necessarily acting according to biblical standards.

    9. Mark on Sat, December 29, 2007

      Peter,


      The real focus of my question is about cultish behavior of churches. When I see Christians rummaging through the closets of others with impunity, or even if they are just gossiping about others, I’m reminded of David Koresh and Jim Jones.  If a pastor discovers that a member of his church is rummaging through the closets of others, then how much does his church look like a cult? Is it enough for church leaders to just remain silent or should a healthy church take any extra steps to make sure their congregations reject cultish behavior, concentrate on their own sins and stop searching for modern day witches to burn at the stake?


      Another way to ask the question is:  Is modern Christianity a license to gossip and if not then what should the church leadership do to condemn and reject gossip?


      You used the example of alcoholism above.  Does the loving confrontation of an alcoholic justify rummaging through someone else’s closets and gossiping about what is found?  Do the ends justify the means?  Once you finish confronting the alcoholic what do you, as a church leader, do to confront the gossip?

    10. Peter Hamm on Sun, December 30, 2007

      Mark,


      I’ve only heard, as I said, your side of the story. But it sounds believable and plausible. So, if I side with you based on that, I can say this.


      Gossip is NOT a church problem… It’s not a Christianity problem… It’s not a faith problem…


      It’s people behaving badly and improperly and sinfully in a fallen world that seems to, for some reason, celebrate this particular sin above all others, with the possible exception of greed… with a little lust thrown on top.


      Now… If somebody is concerned that their husband or wife or family member might be using drugs or abusing alcohol or something, and they are encouraged to really “get in the face with grace” which might include rummaging through the sock drawer looking for something (like a parent might do with a kid or a husband with a wife or vice versa). Doesn’t sound like that’s what was happening with you.


      But going through somebody’s mail because somebody might disapprove of your friends (if it really is that simple)… is a whole different story. If these friends are making you stumble in a big way, maybe I could understand the intent, but NOT the method you describe. The thing to do would be to lovingly and directly confront you, not do something like that behind your back… (I would be concerned about a fellow believer that hangs around with a “bad crowd” which results in him behaving sinfully, but I’m also concerned about believers who only hang around other believers… that’s just not what we’re supposed to do…)


      And again, if the church celebrates and encourages gossip, it’s a good church to leave.


      By the way, if your girlfriend was rummaging through your mail and actually opening it and reading it… she may have been committing a federal offense, and as Christians we are really supposed to respect the laws of the land. If her pastor actually encouraged her to do this, I would have a friendly (okay, maybe not too friendly) discussion with him.


      But I URGE you to find a gathering of believers that’s not a bunch of cult-like wackos! Some of us are really okay!

    11. Mark on Sun, December 30, 2007

      Peter, I had three or four unpleasant meetings with this pastor/elder and made my objections known but his response was a steadfast attitude that his responsibility to protect the church from even unfounded rumors of inappropriate behavior trumps any issues I may have with the invasion of my private property.  He kept trying to call my friendships, “relationships”,  in a desperate attempt to attach some dark immoral or illegal purpose to them and thus justify his actions.  I found that to be particularly offensive.  That’s when we parted ways.


      What IS the difference between a “friendship” and a “relationship” ??


      This one story of mine is just another symptom of a very large problem within the modern Christian church,  When Christians believe they have a mandate from Jesus to invade everyone else’s private business instead of tending to their own sins and failed lives, then people like me have to put on a milquetoast facade so as not to offend the most sensitive members in the church.  Its extra infuriating when they don’t manage to find enough to be offended during church activities so they feel the need to rummage through the closets of other’s in order to dig up something to be offended about.  It almost seems like an addiction with some Christians.


      I have decided a church environment such as that all too common and is not worth the effort.

    12. Peter Hamm on Mon, December 31, 2007

      Mark writes


      [When Christians believe they have a mandate from Jesus to invade everyone else’s private business instead of tending to their own sins and failed lives, then people like me have to put on a milquetoast facade so as not to offend the most sensitive members in the church.]


      Not in my church, and not in many others. So sorry about your experience. I can only urge you not to give up on church completely. Done well, and done right, biblical community is the best way to live life.

    13. Brian on Mon, December 31, 2007

      Mark,


      I agree with Peter.


      My own suggestion would be to understand that one church is not indicative of all churches (or even many or most), and to look for a church that practices the kind of love and appreciation that Jesus talks about.


      There are no perfect churches, and any church you find will have areas you find hard to accept or agree with.


      That’s because even though Jesus owns the church, it is still made up of fallible, imperfect humans like you and me.


      I’m very sorry to hear about your experience at this church, and given what you have shared, I am shocked as well.


      Praying that you will not give up on the Church because of the actions of a few people.


      I would be more than happy to visit with you through e-mail or whatever to help you in your search for meaningful fellowship with the church.  And I’m guessing Peter and others who frequent this site would do the same.


      You can reach me at [removed]
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      Brian

    14. Camey on Mon, December 31, 2007

      Mark,


      As this year comes to a close, and a new one begins.. I encourage you to take refuge in God moreso than man. Allow Him to heal your hurts and then lead you to a church body where you can feel at home because you find Him sitting there with you, beside you, behind you…. and etc….


      I know I am not the only one who has been praying for you since you first posted. Actually for all involved….


      May 2008 be the year that God reveals Himself to you more than at any other time in your life. And may you help others see Him.


      Psalm 118:8,


      Camey

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