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15 Signs Your Church Has Sold Out To Corporate Sponsors

Orginally published on Saturday, December 03, 2005 at 2:20 PM
by Todd Rhoades

Props to Ian’s Messy Desk for this one!  15.  Nike "swoosh" on the cross 14.  Communion now sponsored by Welch’s Grape Juice 13.  In Christmas play, Joseph seen with a pack of Marlboros…

  • Statue of Mary seen holding keys to a Jeep
  • The 12 disciples replaced by Disney characters
  • Greeters all dressed like Mr. Goodwrench
  • Scripture verses brought to you by Microsoft
  • The holy water font has Perrier
  • Offering envelopes say, "Weekly expenses, $6,200, projection unit for Sunday School, $1,400, Basketball hoop for the gym, $250, regular tithing, priceless.
  • Handicap parking sponsored by the Family Medical Group, LLC
  • Bulletin has coupon section
  • Wednesday night suppers sponsored by KFC
  • Church bell chimes to the tune of the NBC chimes
  • Choir robes with the Lands' End logo on the front
  • Church flag football team sponsored by the NFL

  • This post has been viewed 455 times so far.



     TRACKBACKS: (0) There are 4 Comments:

    • Posted by

      I love it when Christian folks take a little time to poke fun at their family members.  It saves the “outsiders” from getting the first swipes and helps to dislodge the natural hubris that seems to afflict all of us.  I tell my kids we need to learn to laugh at ourself; others are gonna do that anyway and we might as well join in since it’s more fun that way.  (And I have a special place in my heart for good satire).  Thanks!

    • Posted by

      I loved them man.. I am taking them to my pastor to read for Sundany

    • Posted by

      16. Church softball league sponcered by Redman

      17. Church seats provided by Lazyboy

      18. Prayer walking sponsered by Adidas

    • you might add to your list a coffee area featuring Starbucks.

    • Page 1 of 1 pages

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