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Brady Boyd Addresses His Critics
Orginally published on Monday, February 02, 2009 at 7:50 AM
by Todd Rhoades
From Brady Boyd (Ted Haggard's successor at New Life Church), addressing the criticism of him and the church in the recent new allegations:
I have two principles that guide my decisions as father, a husband and a pastor. I learned these two principles from my parents and from many of the mentors I have in my life.
Principle One: Do the right thing, for the right reason, even at my own hurt.
Principle Two: Say what you mean and mean what you say.
These two principles were put to the test this past week as I navigated the media frenzy surrounding the new allegations involving our church...
I have told several close friends this week that it is really hurtful to be
criticized so strongly for simply doing the right thing. I actually believe
it is easier to accept criticism after doing something wrong. If that was
the case, I would stand before my family, my church and the media and simply
accept the responsibility and the consequences. But when no wrong act has
been committed, it hurts to be misunderstood or questioned.
Integrity is something I cherish and protect. It is easily lost and
difficult to regain. When my integrity is questioned, I try not to be
defensive but I also want truth. In the end, I know God sees my heart and
ultimately He is my judge. I trust my reputation into His hands and believe
that He will ultimately defend me.
I find it is easier for people to trust again if my words are honest and
direct. I try to not speak in codes or double speak. Straightforward
communication with sincerity and honesty will normally cut through the fog
of misinformation and allow people to make the right judgments.
These two principles are big leadership ideas that I hope are adopted by
everyone in a position of influence or authority. It is a sacred
responsibility to lead people and I consider it an honor to be called
pastor.
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There are 9 Comments:
Hi... I'm Todd Rhoades. I'm a Christ-follower, husband, father and I love to connect leaders with other leaders. Hopefully you'll find something here at MMI you like and will return often. If you want, you can find out more about me or follow my every step on Twitter.
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Monday, February 02, 2009 at 11:12 AM
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Monday, February 02, 2009 at 7:53 PM
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Tuesday, February 03, 2009 at 2:58 PM
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Wednesday, February 04, 2009 at 10:33 AM
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Thursday, February 05, 2009 at 11:07 AM
Post Your Comments:“I have told several close friends this week that it is really hurtful to be criticized so strongly for simply doing the right thing.”
Does this mean that his notion of doing the, “right thing,” is paying over $150,000 in hush money--I mean, “compassionate assistance"--to ask someone to be quiet about a second illicit relationship with New Life’s former pastor? A former pastor who also received roughly the same amount of money in his dismissal for allegations of those same types of actions? Since when is that called, “the right thing?”
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CS
What a load of fluff…
How about he actually says something or if he is not going to. Dont say fluff which wastes time as it does not address anything at all.
Also if Ted went back on the ‘deal’ surely they could ask for the money etc back as he broke a deal.
Sooner Ted stops winging to the media, they are NOT your friends and takes responsibility the better for all us people having to read and put up with him clogging the media with bad allegations about Christians.
Time to focus on what God is doing instead of idiots.
Ok my rant is over…
CS,
I can’t say that I completely agree or disagree with New Life’s response to the situation; however I’m sure there is information we don’t have that may have influenced their decision. (And, I’m not talking about the public criticism and negative publicity/reputation that most people assume causes the church to do things in secret to protect their good name- I think we all get that.)
I wonder how things would have turned out if the pastor stood up and told the entire congregation about the situation (whether in general or in details). How would the lives of people be different? Better? How much should the congregation know vs. how much should the public know. Obviously, uncovering and dealing with sin in the ranks must take place in every church, but is the fact that it’s a mega church and the fact that a large sum of money was given away make this a larger news story than it should be? And while true spiritual healing is always possible in God, if we submit our lives to Him, can the other types of healing necessary truly be brought about in something so publicized?
What response do you think is proper and scripturally sound? What response best serves all parties involved. Again, I’m not saying I agree with them (or disagree with you), I’d just like to hear your thoughts.
Mike:
“What response do you think is proper and scripturally sound? What response best serves all parties involved. Again, I’m not saying I agree with them (or disagree with you), I’d just like to hear your thoughts.”
Haggard should have had godly remorse for what he had done back when he did it (metanoia), repented for his sins, stepped down, and asked for the forgiveness of his church. Then, the church should respond by forgiving him and welcoming him as a brother, but not as a pastor. They would help him into a new position outside the ministry where he could be successful and earning a working man’s wages. The other men involved would be asked to repent of their sins, likewise, with similar hopeful reconciliation. God would be glorified and the church would have followed biblical standards.
Instead, Haggard got busted and felt bad because he got busted (metamelomai). He apologized, but did not publicly show repentance based on the actions he has since taken with the media tour, trying to step back into ministry, and even promoting a salacious HBO documentary about him. The church chose to pay him a huge sum of money to go away instead of rebuking him for his sin because of his lack of repentance. The church also paid hush money to at least one man so that he would not say anything to the news to further damage the situation, instead of calling him to repent in a similar manner. And, through this, the name of God has been dragged through the mud once more in the eyes of the public and the church ignored biblical standards.
The size of the church and publicity were what took it into the national spotlight. However, this would have become a non-issue over time if the biblical model had been followed.
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CS
CS,
That’s good stuff. I appreciate your comments. Another question. I don’t know that it was made clear about when the new pastor found out about everything concerning the second situation. Obviously the legal stuff gets in the way when we don’t do things as Scripture teaches us. If the hush deal was in place before he arrived, was he put in a position where he couldn’t say anything about this second incident.
Do you think he’s saying “the church” in some instances about decisions that were actually made by Ted and his leadership, or by those in leadership after Ted was gone? I wonder if he’s getting a bad rap because the church made some decision and now as their “new face” he is saying “we” or “the church” instead of “them” (the church before I got here) because he is now part of that congregation, though he may not have had any part in those decisions?
It seems like Pastor Boyd is having to confess for the decisions of others. Could it be that he’s saying here in this story that it’s tough to take the criticism for doing the right thing i.e. telling the public and church members what the leadership had done (before him)? (Something I couldn’t do before now) And in attempts to foster unity and help with the transition, has avoided expressing (in public) that he thinks those leader’s made a bad/wrong decision? It doesn’t appear as though anyone asked him his thoughts about the decision. You think he needs to come out publicly and say I had nothing to do with it, that was them? If he doesn’t is he “as bad” as the rest of the leaders? Your thoughts?
Michael:
To be fair, you asked more than just one question. But, here we go. =)
On Jan 26, the Boston Herald reported the story, including these details:
--"Three weeks ago, Boyd told the New Life volunteer not to go public about his relationship with Haggard, which occurred before the evangelical leader was fired from the church in November 2006.”
--""Let’s separate New Life’s reputation from Ted Haggard’s reputation,” Boyd said. “Ted is not affiliated with New Life. These recent allegations are on his plate. Not ours."”
--"As for the money, Boyd said, “It was not a payoff. It was compassionate assistance."”
--"At their first meeting in early December, Boyd asked Haggard to postpone the film’s release because it might cause someone to go public with sexual allegations against him.
“Let’s wait until the whole chapter is written,” Boyd told Haggard.”
Looking at all these details, I see conflicting information. Boyd said that the recent allegations pertain to Haggard, not New Life, but then he goes and tells the young man involved to be quiet. If it’s not his deal, why say anything at all in the first place? He doesn’t tell Haggard outright to not be involved with HBO, but instead tells him to hold off. And, he still talks about the hush money.
If this were a bad situation into which he walked, why not say so in the first place? Why wallow into the mire? Or, if he is truly in charge of the church with the elders, why not pony up to the mistakes that were made and say they’ll do things right from now on, even if it opens them to liability?
Instead, I see a pastor who did the wrong things and integrated himself into the mess.
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CS
I have a question for you guys.
Do any of you know Ted Haggard or have you been to that Church? If not then aren’t you simply engaged in christian gossip from afar? What does the bible say about gossip? Could you be dragging God’s name through the mud with your gossip in this thread just as much as Ted Haggard ever did?
Think about whether or not your behavior here in this discussion is honoring God?
Mark:
Good questions. I would say that this is not gossip because the intent and purpose here is to view his actions in light of Scripture and the way that churches are to behave. I look to something like 1 Timothy 5:20 which says, “Them that sin rebuke before all, that others also may fear.” And, Romans 16:17 which says, “Now I beseech you, brethren, mark them which cause divisions and offences contrary to the doctrine which ye have learned; and avoid them.”
Thank you for keeping things in check and asking the questions that are appropriate to ask.
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CS
Good morning Mark,
Before responding to your question let me first say that it sounds as though our conversation has offended you. Please let me be the first to apologize if my remarks have done so. That is certainly not my intent.
Secondly to answer your question yes have been to the church.
Thirdly, I understand gossip to be “idle (inactive) talk or rumors about another person”. What’s been said is certainly not rumors. Nor has the conversation (in my opinion) been idle chat. My whole intent was to gain understanding; as it can be difficult sometimes to properly understand and appropriately apply Scripture in many instances. There seems to be a lot of issues surrounding integrity in the pulpit, particularly those involving sexual sin. And the church seems to be confused about how to handle such situations as is clearly seen here and in situations like it. I’m learning how we in fact should deal with such situations. My perspective is being broadened by being able to talk about such issues, particularly when Bible Colleges and seminaries are either avoiding the issue all together, or teaching in such a way that issues are dealt with, void of the love and forgiveness of God. Everyone wants to ignore this stuff, but Scripture talks about it and I think these are valuable teaching moments for us.
Scripture is full not only of the successes of the prophets and patriarchs, but their weaknesses and failures as well. They teach us how to live. As a young minister and student these types of conversations are valuable to me and I think this honors God.
I don’t feel like I’m dragging God’s name through the mud as He is Holy. I think others are, but even then they don’t represent God. The moment they stop doing what the Word says they’ve started representing themselves and God will expose that, as it has clearly been done here. I think people can always go to the Scriptures and look at a person’s behavior and see whether it is of God or not; so I don’t think His Name will be blemished here. I love the Lord and I believe that the true and living God I serve is big enough to handle our conversation. And I think I’ll serve Him better because I’ve had it.
Love you brother and again I’m sorry for the misunderstanding.
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