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Church Sound Man Disciplined for Raising Pitch on Soloists

Orginally published on Friday, October 20, 2006 at 7:27 AM
by Todd Rhoades

A sound man who played a cruel game with church soloists has been suspended from his post. Chuck Tiff of Cornerstone Community Church, who served at the sound board for 14 years, was found to have taken sadistic satisfaction in finding a soloist's breaking point, then raising the pitch on the sound board so the climactic note in a song caused her voice to crack. He reduced countless women to tears and abject humiliation on Sunday mornings.

Tiff was discovered this past Sunday turning the pitch knob up several notches as Jennifer Hazlet began her rendition of “We Shall Behold Him.” The head usher saw Tiff’s subtle action, confronted him and led him away from the board, returning the pitch to its proper setting.

At a closed-door meeting, Tiff was unrepentant and refused to talk. One entry in his journal, found under the sound board, read, “Broke another one tonight. What glee! She left the platform in tears. I could barely keep from laughing. She deserved it. They all do. They’re not singing for God’s glory, no matter how much they point heavenward when people applaud. Looking forward to next Sunday. They’ve got a duet lined up. Double whammy.”

Tiff’s victims are considering legal action, charging him with emotional distress and humiliation.

“He made me question my very salvation,” says one woman. “He was supposed to be a partner, but he hung us out to dry for his own amusement.”

View more great church news at Larknews.com

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TRACKBACKS: (0) There are 12 Comments:

Posted by

Friday, October 20, 2006 at 8:35 AM

Hee hee… I love the lark.
Posted by

Friday, October 20, 2006 at 2:28 PM

“He made me question my very salvation,” says one woman.

Isn’t that the job of all technical production people?
Posted by

Friday, October 20, 2006 at 10:46 PM

You know that is really sick.

So much for ministry.
Posted by

Saturday, October 21, 2006 at 8:42 AM

This story reminded me of that Far Side cartoon where its the sound guy’s last day and you see him reaching to turn up the “suckiness” knob.
Posted by Alex Schwindt

Saturday, October 21, 2006 at 4:55 PM

It’s too bad that it’s impossible that this is a true story. It would be even funnier if it were.
Posted by

Saturday, October 21, 2006 at 9:47 PM

“Tiff’s victims are considering legal action, charging him with emotional distress and humiliation. “

Now there’s the other cheek if I ever saw one.

Is it just me or do these terms bother anyone else when used in the church by church people:

1. Victims

2. Legal action

3. emotional distress

4. humiliation (not to be confused with humility)

The only one remotely biblical is humiliation....so in that regard maybe this sadistic sound man did them a favor. I know a few singers that could use some humility.....(I personally wouldn’t recommend using the same method though)
Posted by

Sunday, October 22, 2006 at 4:36 PM

Here is my punishment for the soundman:
Have him listen to the recordings of his “pitch raising” mixes (I suppose he made recordings to share with his buddies) for 6 straight hours. He will have to repent
Posted by

Sunday, October 22, 2006 at 11:13 PM

Are any of you singers?

Do you understand how difficult it is to get up in front of a group and sing?

Honestly, if this is true it’s disgusting.
Posted by

Monday, October 23, 2006 at 8:17 AM

Hey everybody,

Larknews is a satirircal news site. It’s a joke, not real… Just for the record, there’s almost always some humorous posts on Friday at MMI. I understand the confusion, though… because it’s a little believable…
Posted by Todd Rhoades

Monday, October 23, 2006 at 8:20 AM

You know, Peter… I almost label all the stuff on Friday as satire; but some of the responses are worth no labeling it. Not to laugh at the expense of readers; but it’s fun to read the responses.

Todd
Posted by

Monday, October 23, 2006 at 8:52 AM

I always knew it was the sound guy’s fault! I could never make so many mistakes while singing!
Posted by

Monday, October 23, 2006 at 3:58 PM

Is there really a pitch nob on the sound board? If you can adjust it to make singers sound bad can you do just the opposite? If so where can I get a sound board like that??

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