A Prayer for Another Fallen Servant…
- Posted by: Todd
- Posted on: Mon, June 08, 2009
- Viewed 475
- (61) comments so far
These thoughts are random… so bare with me.
1. This is, perhaps, one of the first falls from grace that includes an element of social networking. As an avid blogger and twitterer, I know that power of social networking. When I go to conferences and gatherings, people recognize me from my small 1x1 picture on my blog and on twitter. People feel a kind of personal attachment with me (even though we’ve never met). I feel that same, kinda weird feeling about them. It’s hard to explain, but you really do feel like you get to know someone online… their likes, their dislikes, their personality, their passions, their work, their family. These is a bond. With yesterday’s announcement, Gary Lamb stirred up the bond that he had created with those who know him. But this fall was different… not only did this affect his family, friends, and local church, it also hit hard a few thousand people all over the country who feel they knew Gary personally (even though they had never met). In fact, there have been over 150 tweets alone in the last 24 hours from people who have commented that they are praying for Gary and all involved.
2. Of all the comments online so far, most are supportive of Gary, which I think is good. Most offered support for Gary and his wife. Fewer offered support for the gal caught up in the affair, but that was probably because no one knows her or her family. A few of the comments were a little more transparent… thinks like how upset they were or how they had a terrible feeling in the pit of their stomach.
3. I must give credit to Gary that he took ownership of 100% of this, and stated that he was 100% behind the leadership of Revolution Church in asking him to step down. He said that he had disqualified himself from leadership of the church (which I believe to be true at this time). Hopefully Gary will be able to truly back-off from the church and let them heal. So many times, I see this kind of situation happen, and while there is immediate repentance, it is quickly followed by a sense of entitlement of what the church owes this person, and how quickly they can be restored to leadership. I hope that doesn’t happen here. Everyone needs time to heal.
4. Another interesting part of this story is the documented online history that Gary has online during the past six weeks (during his admitted affair). According to his tweets, Gary and Revolution Church were seeing some amazing things happen for the Kingdom. This included a family vacation, a marriage retreat, his assistant watching his kids and then hanging out with his wife, and baptizing a ton of people at the church. Even during this season of sin, there was an appearance that all was well and God was blessing.
5. My thought (and I’ve blogged on this before). You just don’t wake up one morning and sleep with your assistant. Satan had to have achieved smaller victories in Gary’s life over time to make this one possible.
6. The ramifications of this extend far beyond the online community, the church, and family. It also spreads to the community that Revolution Church is trying to reach. So many people are looking for an excuse to write off a successful church and it’s message. For those people, this is the only excuse they need.
7. There will be some that will say they saw this coming. Others will come down like a brick on Gary. Yet others will pick apart everything Gary has said over the years from the pulpit or in his blog. That’s really not necessary. God has used Gary Lamb in a great way; and may use Gary in a great way in the future (though that’s still uncertain).
8. And for all of us who may feel self righteous from time to time, we need to get over ourselves… because this could happen to us. Matter of fact, some reading this, it is happening to right now. Another group is real close to making a similar decision as Gary made six weeks ago. Stop it. You will most likely be humiliated. You will humiliate your wife and kids, your church, and your family. It’s not worth it.
I guess that’s it right now. My prayers go out to Gary, his wife and kids, Revolution Church, and to his assistant and her family.
Todd
Word came over yesterday that yet another pastor had fallen. Many of you are familiar with the ministry of Gary Lamb of Revolution Church. Yesterday, Gary was forced to resign his church after admitting to a six week 'emotional and physical affair' with his personal assistant. Gary has had a very public persona on-line through his blog, twitter, etc. He has been known as a passionate church planter, an outspoken leader, and a bit of a renegade. I've had the opportunity to meet and talk with Gary several times over the years and consider him a ministry friend. So, when word hit yesterday at his blog, it caused me (as many others) to have a ton of different feelings and thoughts. I want to share some of those with you here today...
Comments
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Charley Blom on Mon, June 08, 2009
The Comments have been good. We do need to remember all, the two ‘sinner’s the family members, the church in our prayers and that God’s grace and glory will be advanced. Sadly this is not the first time this has happened, nor is it the last time. Probably, only a guess here, there have been other moral failures this week in the pastoral ranks, but because the pastor is not ‘famous’ or ‘twitters’ etc or the church is small they will be in the background. There will still be the same hurt, pain and difficulties as with this situation. What disturbs me, I spend my time in ministry working with pastors, is Gary’s self confession in his Sunday Night Mind Dump, Blog, dated May 24, 2009. There he makes these two statements:
“I’m not a big fan of gossip so let me give you the 411: Revolution is almost 5 years old and I have been consumed with her 24/7. As much as I tried to take off, I never really did. Even on vacations, I would work. I’m toast.” and “You can’t give the amount of time and energy that I have to Revolution without neglecting something else. I’m ashamed to say the thing I have neglected is my wife and children. That is wrong and there is no excuse for it.”
How true. Here is the beginning of the confession, no time to let God be God in his life. No time with his wife and family, he was letting ministry get in the way of the basic priorities of ministry life. With his other statements, he was caught where we all can be caught, believing our own press. Believing that by our efforts we will build the church. Pastors and ministry leaders need time away from ministry for renewal, and time with the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. But even more we need to learn that ministry flows out of what God does in and through us. The branch never bears fruit by itself, it needs to be attached to the vine. I only pray that young pastors, middle age pastors and older pastors will hear the message of Gary and examine their lives before it is too late. One other thought, since Gary planted this church, what lessons on work, ministry and no time off has he left as his legacy that his church and staff will have to deal with? This may not be the last pastoral leader to fall because of over work from that church?
Marty Duren on Mon, June 08, 2009
A few of my thoughts on this situation, others like it and how they might be prevented are here:
http://iemissional.com/2009/06/08/thoughts-regarding-fallen-pastors/
sam on Mon, June 08, 2009
Peter,
The rise of the number of conferences has added to the rise of the “rockstar” culture that Marty Duren speaks of. Pastors that already struggle with pride like Gary get their ego continually pumped by joining the conference circuit. There is a real danger with pride that coomes with using social networking technology as well. How many people read my blog? How many people befriend me on Facebook? How many people follow me on Twitter?
AND you can deny the “celebrity culture” all you want that exists today with certain pastors but it is real. And I imagine the pressures that come along with maintaining that as well can be a problem.
Gary is 100% responsible for his actions to be sure but hopefully we can look at factors that led to this in order that other church planters and pastors be warned not to fall into the same snares.
Ricky on Tue, June 09, 2009
“Gary often blogged/ spoke about how he entered ministry as a Pastor one month after becoming a Christian.
No one in his circle seemed to have any reservations about this.”
And yet, Todd, in all of his experiences with “leaders,” either had no problem with this or was fooled by Lamb’s charisma.
I also find it interesting that Solomon was quoted, a king, which is exactly what most pastor’s think of themselves. In this case, Lamb took the mantle himself immediately after coming to Christ and begins to amass his following…all heady stuff for a newbie, which is why Paul warned about new converts.
While I read Todd’s thoughts I began to think that “I wonder if this guy became a ‘pastor’ shortly after his conversion?” Unfortunately, I was right. I’ve seen this numerous times and each time is a punch to the stomach as thoughts of how this incident will hinder the word of the Kingdom.
But it’s not all Lamb’s fault. It’s the system’s. It breeds this type of thing and yet no one wants to look at that. They just feign remorse.
Mark my words, this is not the only affair Lamb has had. There will be other information coming out that involves others. I just hope we all learn from this event and return to a more authentic expression of church life where no one is seen higher than another and vulnerability replaces that tired old excuse for control…accountability.
jud on Tue, June 09, 2009
Back in my hometown my family is a part of what I consider one of the most remarkable churches I’ve seen. All of the elders preach along with the “pastor” in a rotation. The pastor is an ELDER in every sense of the word and the elders PASTOR the people as much as the pastor PASTORS the people.
I’ve been a part of several church plants where from the get go the pastor doesn’t actually PASTOR. He speaks. He has time for “strategic relationships” with the powerful people, the well connected people and the beautiful people. A massive staff has to be accumulated to take care of all the people drawn to his charismatic personality.
Then it all begins to crumble from the inside out.
It takes a LONG time to unwind but just like in this case, the programming, the system and the stylists keep everything running smoothly ... until the bottom drops out.
This at least has been my experience.
Peter Hamm on Tue, June 09, 2009
Ricky,
I think you’re right on when you say [I just hope we all learn from this event and return to a more authentic expression of church life where no one is seen higher than another and vulnerability replaces that tired old excuse for control…accountability.] The system you mention can indeed breed this kind of thing, although I wouldn’t go so far as to assume that this man necessarily had any affairs before. Read this again pastors. If you don’t have real accountability, you are in a system that is indeed set up for you to fail and to fall. SET UP that way!
And Jud,
You say that you’ve [been a part of several church plants where from the get go the pastor doesn’t actually PASTOR]. Wow. Great point. If you can combine the accountability that Ricky mentions with the real down-and-dirty act of pastoring that you mention here, I think we have something. That said, elders and other leaders in the church need to lead (which needs to be done without the phenomenon Ricky describes of one being seen as higher than another), or the church will never grow beyond the few people that a pastor can really disciple.
Wow, I agreed with something Ricky said AND something Jud said! The apocalypse must be upon us. http://www.mondaymorninginsight.com/images/smileys/wink.gif
But Sam, I think it’s still a stretch to blame groups like the Leadership Network. They’ve helped me IMMENSELY over the years, in their print publications and directly through some of their people (like Todd). A celebrity culture will grow up around any pastor who is a good speaker, regardless of how much they guard against it, because spiritually undeveloped people will create it, even if the pastor doesn’t, maybe especially if the pastor doesn’t.
Scott Pollard on Tue, June 09, 2009
Before everyone starts debating over something that isn’t factual let me throw this in. Ridgestone/Revolution is not Gary’s only experience in ministry. He planted another church previous to this and also served on staff at another church. He DID NOT accept Christ one month and start Revolution the next. I met Gary many years ago on the forums at pastors.com and you can probably still find posts from him there to prove these facts.
RevScottie
Todd Rhoades on Tue, June 09, 2009
Sam,
Your ‘rockstar’ conference theory has a big hole it the side of it.
There have been big conferences for decades. Jack Hyle’s pastor’s conference was huge for years.
And if you want to talk about superstar pastors and the organizations that support them… also… been around for years. Many of which are still around.
Even John MacArthur has a big conference. Some might even consider him a superstar.
Pastors have always looked to other pastors who are ‘successful’ to learn from. Always.
Besides, no one would want to go to a conference put on by a pastors who lead a dying church of 20 people.
Todd
Rev. K on Tue, June 09, 2009
Gary,
Do you actually want the church to return back to being what it supposed to be? Are you asking for the church to select leaders based upon the criteria laid down in Scriptures?
(That’s asking too much of her today…lol)
(After all, according to many of today’s seminarians, Paul’s instructions were descriptive not prescriptive…)
Are you asking for the church to be more concerned about God even if they’re not being relevant? (Do you realize that membership would count down to 1/3… Do you realize if the church followed the Scriptures than the monetary intake would recess? Gary, do you realize if the church followed the mandates of Scripture, it would loose its popularity and she would be less attractive to the world?)
Gary, how can you put such restraints on the church today? To actually follow God’s Word? That’s asking for too much… according to today’s dogmatism…
(For the record, Gary… I agree with you 100%)
God said that He would give us pastors after His own heart… the problem with many of congregations is they have called pastors after their own heart… we can’t blame this mess on God… He wasn’t in it from the beginning… when we the church call leaders after worldly systems… then we’re prone to fail… and we set up those whom we called to fail… we’re in sin… we also have to repent for not following God’s Word…
I too was suspect of one pastoral leadership (Sr. pastor without accountability to an eldership)… because I’ve seen many of congregations who called pastors after the flesh… but thanks be to God… He allowed me to be under the leadership of my sr. pastor who’s truly a pastor after God’s own heart… and it works… its not an dictatorship… it’s genuine leadership… he pastured our congregation for 40 years and this would be his 41st… and he has lead the congregation according to God’s standard and God’s Word… he has held many of titles but he never let the titles handle him… he’s well respected in our community, state and nation wide… but yet he’s humble… as a young preacher of the Gospel I’m thankful for a pastor who models Christ… Paul told Timothy to do the things he head and saw him do… that’s leadership… one who not only speaks but also lives…
jud on Tue, June 09, 2009
Scott,
I heard from his mouth that he entered ministry as a Pastor a month after he “accepted Christ”. No one insinuated that was as pastor of Revolution Church. However it didn’t take a theologian to understand that there is a time for seasoning to prepare a man for pastoring people….. this was lacking in this case. The peers and mentors of Mr. Lamb bear some responsibility here.
Scott Pollard (RevScottie) on Tue, June 09, 2009
Taking one comment from Gary and running with it does lead to insinuation if the entire story isn’t presented. Gary planted a church in Iowa and BY HIS OWN ADMISSION it was not the church it should have been because he did everything wrong. He then served at West Ridge church in preparation for being a church planter. This thread insinuates that Gary was a “RockStar” with no experience and that leaders around him where so anxious to push him forward that they didn’t catch flaws that would lead to his failure. That is not an accurate picture of what happened at all. Do you really think that if Gary had served as a youth pastor, and then as an associate, and then struggled as a senior pastor with 50 members things would have been any different? Gary gave in to the same temptation that countless pastors have given in to no matter how “seasoned” they are.
Tim on Tue, June 09, 2009
CS…
If this act occurred in Minnesota it may have been a crime. They have a state law making it a crime for a clergy member to have sex with a person who is seeking or receiving “religious or spiritual advice, aid, or comfort in private.” (Minn. Stat. sec. 609.344, subd. 1(l)(ii))
Several other states have similar laws. This also falls into the category of Sexual Harassment as Lamb was her direct supervisor in an employment situation.
It doesn’t surprise me that you and others making comments have not picked up on this. This type of abuse has gone on without recourse for a long time.
CS on Tue, June 09, 2009
Tim:
Those laws to which you referred are civil laws and not the Law of God. Those are two totally different things.
When Lamb and the assistant began their adultery, she had a choice—agree to the sin, or walk away from it. Yes, she may have lost her job for objecting to Lamb’s approach and engagement with her, but we are told to flee from sexual sin, no matter what the cost (think of Joseph and Potiphar’s wife).
Yes, those civil laws may give her some sort of recourse here on Earth, whether just or unjust, but she will still either have to give an account for her part in the sin that took place, or Christ will wipe away her sin through His sacrifice on the cross, which would cause her to repent.
—
CS
Leonard on Tue, June 09, 2009
There is a sadness to this situation that goes beyond words. There is a wife and children betrayed. Betrayed by someone who was supposed to be doing right. The blurring of lines between ministry and God are hard when life is great and even harder when life is painful. The Lamb kids and wife need our prayers.
There is a church that is rocked. Leaders who are now scrambling, while wrestling with a sense of betrayal and hurt. Staff members who are trying to put in place what happened without bitterness setting its root. People on a faith journey who now will struggle to see the Grace of God in this mess. Trust is broken. This church needs our prayers.
There is a woman who has allowed her heart to love a married man. She has allowed her affections to be given to him and she must now deal with the repercussions of that sin.
There is a pastor who publicly challenged but privately drifted. He has much to answer for and the only way to answer for it is Christ.. But the answering is so tough most pastors never make it through the rigors of a process. He needs our prayers.
It is frustrating to see us do much more here than to simply empathize and offer our prayers. To speculate, to postulate and then to diagnose Gary, this woman and the wife or the church is really not much use here.
Thanks Todd for the post and for the invitation to pray. It is much needed. For those of us in the pastorate, can I encourage you in 2 ways.
Watch the drift. Little things you let slide today will impact the kingdom, your life, the lives of people you love and lead. Of most importance they hurt the heart of God.
Don’t let the shrill dissecting of this sad and serious situation we see from some people here keep you from finding a safe place for accountability. Blogs attract some of the most genuine and beautiful people while at the same time give license to people who have forgotten how to love. Some of those folks have surfaced here and I implore you, in spite of them… seek accountability and if necessary take the time to correct any drift you might have.
For you bloggers who seek every situation to insert the same opinion, time after time after time after time… I know you will not hear this at all or in the spirit in which it is intended, but please check yourself. None of you sound much like Jesus kneeling on the ground, speaking to a barely clad woman about her sin. His words… Go change.
Gary, go change and live in freedom. Assistant… go change and live in freedom… I will pray for you. Lamb family, I will pray for you. your finances, your future, your today are all up in the air right now. I am sorry and sad for you. His grace is sufficient. Revolution church, you are also in my prayers and as a pastor, I am so sorry you were betrayed by a pastor. I wish it were different. I will also pray for you.
Ray on Tue, June 09, 2009
So many posts talk about sadness, grace and forgiveness. Where’s the indignation? Where’s the righteous anger that someone in such a position cared more about his own gratification than he did bringing glory to God?
I’m all for preaching grace. But every time a pastor does this, it makes it that much easier for the lost to discount the church… and the gospel.
I guess the politicians have got it right. In America, it really doesn’t matter what you do, as long as you apologize in a sincere manner.
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