1 in 4 People: Church Hoppers
- Posted by: Todd
- Posted on: Wed, September 28, 2005
- Viewed 122
- (43) comments so far
So... I'm interested in what you think... what reasons do you think that this is the case?
I'll start:
People are fickle. People leave over anything. People like to stir up controversy. People can't get along. People can't get past their own preferences and leave on a dime when something is cated to them.
I think an interesting study would be to see how many 'repeat offenders' there are in this group. How many church hoppers change every five years. I know a slew of them from my past. And how does this same group of people keep getting ticked off every five years or so.
I almost think that the church is divided into two groups... the 'hoppers' and the 'lifers'. (The 'lifer's would never leave a church, even if there WAS a good reason).
What say you?
Todd
According to a recent study: 1. 1 in 4 church attendees have switched churches in the past five years. 2. On average, just 7% of new attenders are formally unchurched…
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Ralph & Patty McCracken, Common Ground Outreach on Tue, October 04, 2005
Most people join a church to be a part of it. I believe alot of people disconnect because they are either…feeling unwanted…not needed…or just simply feeling like they fit in. They think another church will fill the bill. Just like Pastors who leave and move on. They are not feeling united to the body. If they did it would be hard to seperate when you know the people there want and need you. Today I spoke with a gentleman who he said his Pastor encouraged him to be a Deacon in the church. He told me that he at the time was thinking about finding another church because he felt he had nothing to offer his church and felt that he was “out of sort”. He said that when his Pastor encouraged him to be a Deacon he did not feel he was good enough and that someone else should have that position. But because his Pastor expressed his respect for him and encouraged he to help support that ministry he has been on board strong ever since…. 20 years strong! This same man went to go to the hospital today… not as a patient, the Pastor suffered a stroke and he knew he had to go to lift him up and encourage him to hang in their just like he did for him 20 years ago.
autumnfaire on Tue, October 04, 2005
I am a church hopper because I have been to many churches where no one spoke to me and /or I have volunteered to be involved and was told ‘no, thank you’. Yes, I have taken the first step to reach out (and the 2nd, 3rd, etc.)after a while, I get tired of the cliques. I would love to be involved in the church, (I have a degree in Christian Education and a Masters in Bible)but it seems that churches are picky about who may be involved—married at a young age, have young children, good income, nice home, etc.—so I have stopped trying….
Donna on Tue, October 04, 2005
Who would leave church if it was really that much like Jesus is? You’d have to throw us out, you couldn’t get away.
Is church structured the way the New Testament says it should be? No.
Does it seem as if leadership is open to becoming more like the N.T. states we should be? No.
Do I grow more in faith and love in church or out of church? Is there real truth and love in church or too much dead religiosity?
Does Jesus go to your church because I rarely see Him there anymore.
An awful lot of us are tired of sitting in an audience listening to one person be our intermediary, hearing pop psychology from motivational speakers in the pulpit, being female and hearing constant football references, hearing preachers yell, hearing Dianetics clothed in christian lingo, seldom hearing the New Covenant, or sensing the living Jesus.
Life is too short. Jesus lives in me and other born again saints so He’s not hard to find outside of your church building and plenty of us have given our lives, decades for pastors who barely seem to know Him much less bow to His lead and follow.
Sorry.
That’s about the sum of it.
Ian on Tue, October 04, 2005
Church hoppers I’ve known are some of the most sincere christians I’ve ever met.
The story will differ slightly with each individual, but it usually goes something like this:
A person gets saved, genuinely, through an act of the Holy Spirit. After a few months of trying to follow Jesus via the Holy Spirit and a Bible they start to get hungry for fellowship with other christians.
Usually they look for a church nearby, a few lucky ones may hit the jackpot on the first try but most sincerely walk into church being babes in Christ innocently walking into a wolves den.
They start doing the things the people in the church say they ought to do even though often it doesn’t bear witness with their spirit or jibe with what they’ve read in the New Testament, but they figure, “I’m just a new christian what do I know? They know more, they are experienced christians.”
Sooner or later they find out the things they’ve been asking prayer for in the prayer group have been spread about as gossip, and they are being treated differently. They get put in a category. Church bodies are less likely to instantly recognise a change of the Spirit in someone so they keep relating to someone in the same way they ‘saw’ them before.
If the new christian starts noticing blatant disregard for scripture among leadership and has the courage to say, “The Emperor has no clothes” they are instantly branded a rebel and a divider, kicked out or severely reprimanded for saying the truth, even if they offered it in love.
Then the congregant will either choose to forget about their convictions from the Holy Spirit, they will think themselves wrong, mistaken, or will simply shut up in order to not be mistaken for strife and be unloved.
This can be very confusing for believers. Who ARE we to follow? Jesus or the people who say they are Jesus’ leadership.
If the person is strong in their peace in the Holy Spirit or can stand strong they may be good enough at hearing God to know whether God is saying ‘bear with this and pray for them’ or ‘come, follow Me’.
Instead, what happens more often is that many younger christians are vulnerable and get confused by the unexpected rejection and differences between the Holy Spirit of God through Jesus Christ living in and through them as opposed to ‘church leadership’ and the ‘traditions of men’that they find themselves confronted with.
If the congregant has their worldly ‘act’ together it may be more appealing to them to toss their inner, Spirit led conviction in order to keep their ‘seat’ in the “country club for the well adjusted”.
But if they are still vulnerable, sick, poor, wounded or a general outcast from society (the kind of people Jesus so often loves to pick as His disciples), they’ll most likely start searching elsewhere, hoping to find a church where they can experience the love and genuine Life of Christ available to them and inviting their participation.
To blame ‘church hoppers’ as you call them for the divisions in the Body of Christ is ludicrous, considering that before any of us here now were even born, the Body of Christ was already divided into many hundreds if not thousands of factions and sometimes warring denominations.
What’s a Babe in Christ to do?
Maria on Tue, October 04, 2005
Many ‘church hoppers’ are just looking for The Father’s House as typified in Luke 15 the Prodigal Son parable:
A place where a wounded, repentant son can find love and acceptance and recognition for being the son that he is without being given the ‘third degree’ from the elder brother.
There are so many churches in most areas there might be a better experience elsewhere.
Church is usually not a very rewarding experience or more people would be doing it.
And I don’t mean rewarding as in receiving. There are few churches allowing all the christians sitting to give out what God has been putting in them all week.
Eventually they atrophy.
Whoever said we were supposed to gather in one building with the same people year after year in the first place? We are commanded to GO, preach the gospel, make disciples of all men everywhere.
We are designed in Christ to be more action oriented people, fluid, a Living Body, with a head, Jesus.
When the World sees the church loving and caring for one another instead of biting and devouring one another then they will know we are His disciples, by our love for one another.
Phil Hoover-Chicago on Thu, October 20, 2005
After I moved to Chicago, circumstances made it clear that I would need to find a “home church.” I attended the Moody Church for two years. The first Sunday I entered the facility, the Holy Spirit spoke to my heart, “this is home for now…not forever but for now.”
And two years later, the Lord led me to Chicago Tabernacle. Upon entering that facility, the Lord spoke clearly to me, “This is home.”
I have no plans to leave any time soon. Through thick and thin—this is home.
jo on Mon, October 24, 2005
Wow! What an interesting variety of thoughts. I think that is a sample of how eclectic our culture really is! This is a good thing. I see the problem as us as church leaders not reaching out with love. Yes we love, but do we? We can offer the McChurch version of everything. But like a loud noise, we make….noise. It is love that draws the thirsty to the well. Those in pretty suits have real problems like, their young daughter is hooked on crack…their wife or husband is an alcoholic or hooked on porn. Our churchs are not as pretty as we would like to think. When we decide to love and move agenda’s out of the way….we will surely see a shift, as many are already experiencing. The old song…rescuing the perishing….When the perishing come to church and there is no power, they hop…..and the spin on that is…..or they run because they are hurting or feel misunderstood….or like others would never identify with their hidden problems. The real question is…..will we go out for them? I think you have idetified a new people group to add to the mission lists. Everybody have a blessed day!
Dorothy on Thu, October 27, 2005
When people bounce from church to church, they still have not go over self, meaning they think everything should be done how they see it, and if it’s not then something is wrong with the church, so they continue to search out church that are not operating in the full principals of God, and when a ministry is not operating where they should be in God that congregation is blind to the things of God, so therefore when a person comes in an see that lack that set there until they are exposed.
jeff on Sat, April 08, 2006
My experience is that people leave over:
a. pastoral changes
b. personal conflicts
c. anything to do with kids/youth ministry or music
d. people get sick of the “old boys network”
e. people get tired of incompetent leadership from lower-level paid staff
f. a friend or family member leaves
g. church politics
h. inept, insular, or unspiritual lay leadership, and
i. any combination of the above.
I am about to leave a church that I love, and a pastor who I absolutely revere, because God wants me to start a new work among different people. I may be wrong, but I really believe God has given me an instruction to unite with and support a specific church at this time.
vincent on Sat, May 06, 2006
LEAVERS’ PARADOX
One of the salient points is what I call the leavers’ paradox: the more acitve and dedicated one is, the more likely one is to make enemies or encounter conflict. In most churches, conflict is resolved by the person who is lesser in the POWER STRUCTURE leaving the church. Of course, people with a genuine servant heart are more likely to be very active and less likely to “care” about who has, or has not, temporal power. Therefore, the better you do in serving, the more likely you are to either be “forced out” or to start elsewhere where one has no enemies.
Most pastors seem to label leavers as immature malcontents, but the opposite is often true: a person’s calling, passion, and mission has simply “outgrown” the constraints of a particular church.
Modest suggestions:
1. each pastor should adopt a sophisticated
and intricate conflict resolution system as would be used in business
2. if a church cannot grow because of incompetent or destructive lay power structures, then the church constitution must be changed so that progressives get a voice in the church
3. a church leaver should be thought of as a bringer of a good lesson or an opportunity for growth: the leaver is not your enemy.
4. if growth is desired, then both pastors and lay leaders must STUDY the dynamics of growth, and growth includes retention.
5. forget about all of this “church disciple” nonsense—adults are adults.
If your church practices church discipline, never use it as an excuse to preserve the power and control of established leaders who resist necessary change.
6. accept the fact that church mobility is part of the current religious culture, and work with it rather than against it.
Hope this helps
vincent
brad on Sat, December 16, 2006
people church hop because so many church people are critical, unwelcoming, and/or
incompetent, especially the lay leaders of churches.
Tim H on Mon, March 05, 2007
It’s interesting the number of people who take a critical view of the church “hoppers” without also taking a critical look at the church. Shortly before our first daughter was born (she’s almost 9 now) we joined a local church because we had recently moved across town, and the drive to the former church was becoming a challenge. We found a church which seemed to be very friendly, and Bible-based, and hopped right in, getting pretty involved right away. Unfortunately, we also found that it was very difficult to “connect” with our peer group, many of whom had grown up together, or were related to one another by marriage. Additionally, it only later became apparent that this group took a view of social drinking that we weren’t comfortable with. ... After a while, we decided that we had to make a move. While we loved the people, we never felt that we were truly in fellowship with them, which is certainly one of the purposes of being a part of a local church body.
People “hop” if they don’t connect. Some people can’t make commitments, and therefore can’t connect. At other times, they can’t connect because the existing members are so caught up in their own lives and circles of friends that they can’t/don’t make room for the new members. A local church has to be intentional about being welcoming ... which means more than just smiling at someone and telling them that you’re glad they’re there on Sunday morning. You’ve got to help them create real friendships, and give them opportunities to be involved in ways that utilize their gifts.
We’ve been members at the same church for over 7 years now, and we’re about to hop again. We have moved to a new neighborhood, and some friends have started a new church that’s practically in our back yard. ... It’s specifically aimed at reaching the unchurched, and we feel that we’re much more likely to be able to invite our neighbors there than to our current church. Members of our current church understand our reason for leaving, and nobody has implied that we’re not following God’s will by moving.
Sorry for rambling. I guess the point I’m making is that statistics are just that. They’re statistics. They’re neither good nor bad. They’re just a reflection of what’s happening. To give them meaning, you’ve got to dig deeper and see if you can get at the real reasons people are moving. Sometimes it may be an example of consumerism at work in society, but I suspect that quite often it’s done by people who are sincerely seeking to Follow God’s direction for their lives.
Nikki on Wed, March 07, 2007
I think Joshua Harris’s book, “Stop Dating The Church” is an excellent must-read for church hoppers or potential church hoppers!
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