MondayMorningInsight - Leadership & Encouragement for Church Leaders

Christian School: You Can’t Graduate ‘Cause You Went to the Prom

Posted by: Todd
Posted on: Mon, May 18, 2009
Viewed 77
(24) comments so far

Strike one: Girls in low-cut dresses

Strike two: Girls in low-cut dresses, dancing.

Strike three: Watching girls in low-cut dresses, dancing.

You’re out.

From an AP article: The student in question, Tyler Frost, said he thought he had handled the situation properly. Findlay requires students from other schools attending the prom to get a signature from their principal, which Frost did.

“I expected a short lecture about making the right decisions and not doing something stupid,” Frost said. “I thought I would get his signature and that would be the end.”

England acknowledged signing the form but warned Frost there would be consequences if he attended the dance. England then took the issue to a school committee made up of church members, who decided to threaten Frost with suspension.

“In life, we constantly make decisions whether we are going to please self or please God. (Frost) chose one path, and the school committee chose the other,” England said.

The handbook for the 84-student Christian school says rock music “is part of the counterculture which seeks to implant seeds of rebellion in young people’s hearts and minds.”

England said Frost’s family should not be surprised by the school’s position.

“For the parents to claim any injustice regarding this issue is at best forgetful and at worst disingenuous,” he said. “It is our hope that the student and his parents will abide by the policies they have already agreed to.”

--For the record… it was this type of teaching that kept me from my high school proms. Instead, we did a cheap mock-off of the prom where we ate a chinsey meal; and took a trip to an amusement park (where the boys sat on one side of the bus; girls on the other.) I’m surprised they let us ride the roller coasters together.

This type of Christianity makes me sad; but I know that many involved are sincere and want to do the right thing. It just makes it hard when everything is a sin (and everything is a sin if you’re in this camp for long). Legalism is ugly.

When I saw Tyler interviewed on the local news station, he said that he would think that the people at the school and church (whom he’d know since he was in kindergarten) would give him a little more credit… they should know that he just wanted to go to the prom to be with his girlfriend, not to lust and take part of evil, worldly music.

So… what do you think? Should the boy been allowed to graduate? Or should he be not surprised, since he is in violation of the school handbook.

PS --You can read the whole article here...

OK... so this is happening less than an hour from where I live, and is getting a good amount of local press. So... this kid goes to a Christian school all his life, then decides to go to the local high school prom with his girlfriend. The Christian School then decides to not allow him to graduate because he has gone against the school rules. According to the school, the reasoning being that rock music "is part of the counterculture which seeks to implant seeds of rebellion in young people's hearts and minds." According to the school principal: "When the school committee ... set up the policy regarding dancing, I am confident that they had the principle of fleeing lustful situations in mind ... should a Christian place themselves at an event where young ladies will have low-cut dresses and be dancing in them." Give me a freaking break...

Comments

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Eric Frisch on Mon, May 18, 2009

I grew up about 20 minutes from here (and only live 1 1/2 hours away now), so while I can honestly say I’ve never heard of this school prior to this incident, it does strike somewhat “close to home”.

I think the thing that a lot of folks seem to be forgetting here is that this is a private, Christian school which can create and enforce whatever rules it wants. As I’ve read the stories about this, this is what sticks out at me: there was a policy in place about dancing (which I don’t agree with, either, for the record). A student not only chose to violate that policy, but also informed the administration of his plans by taking in that form to be signed by his principle. In my mind, the principle actually handled this pretty well. He told the student he could go, but made it clear that it would be a violation of school policy and would open him up to consequences. For some reason the student and his parents acted surprised when those consequences actually occurred. Doesn’t work that way.

Don’t get me wrong, I applaud this student for standing up for what he thought was right. Having said that, the school was actually within their rights to do everything they did. I don’t agree with what they did, but I do respect their right to do it. A lot of folks seem to be overlooking that part of this issue.
Ed on Mon, May 18, 2009

Wow Sam wins the huge words award times two for outstandingly obscure words of both “Licentiousness “ and “antinomianism”.. Back to back, no less.
Pat on Mon, May 18, 2009

He and his family should not be surprised since it is in the school’s policy, but gravely disappointed—yes. I’m sure they were hoping for leniency and a lecture like the young man said. Also, CS raises a good point about the principal telling the young man there would be consequences but yet signing the form.

I believe in personal holiness, but this idea of shielding children in a Christian bubble often backfires and can make for socially maladjusted adults who have never mingled or rubbed shoulders with the world. What a rude awakening when they go into the real world and find out that (GASP) even some Christians listen to rock, dance, smoke, etc., etc. I’m surprised that there’s a high school still around like this. We desperately need balance.
Dan Inesanto on Mon, May 18, 2009

I am a bit bothered, along with others, by the way the principle handled it. He signed the form allowing the kid to go and said there would be consequences, but never said what those consequences would be.

The parents and the kid were expecting a lecture or something. I suspect they had some sort of reason for expecting a certain type of consequence - past punishments of the school’s board for similar actions.

The principle apparently didn’t let them know what the consequences would be, and only assigned them afterward.

Had the principle said the kid would be kept from the ceremony ahead of time and the kid went ahead, then that would be one thing. The kid knew what would happen.

But what the principle did - not good.
Lori on Tue, May 19, 2009

Click on my URL for my two cents.
Lisa on Tue, May 19, 2009

How tragic really. Teens who may otherwise have been open to hearing the word of God in this community will use this incident as another reason to think Christians just want everyone to follow rules and not have any fun! Seriously, the Bible says to sing and dance your praises to the Lord-no where does it say no electric guitar allowed, no disco, no keyboards. Teaching teens that we trust them, that through their faith in God, we know they will make the right decisions is a much more powerful message than punishing someone for attending a normal rite of passage in our society.

The principal should have spelled out in clear terms what the consequences were going to be on the spot and refused to sign the form. The principal gave his permission it would seem to me.
Chris Surratt on Wed, May 20, 2009

This brings back many shudder inducing memories from my private high-school past. Boys were not allowed to wear 1/4 length socks because they were deemed too effeminate. You need those manly, full-length socks son!
DanielR on Fri, May 22, 2009

One can hope that this school will only have a handful of students to worry about next year. I think that are playing fast and loose with their authority.

First, the principle warned him there could be consequences but the school then imposed the harshest possible consequence. Their reaction seems a little extreme to me. His explanation of what he expected the consequences to be seems honest and heartfelt. Does this church really believe their actions will strengthen this young mans faith and conviction? Or anyone else’s? Or are they casting this young man aside in the interest of instilling fear in others?

Second, don’t play semantics games with a young mans future. They say they are not preventing him from graduating; they only suspended him, the fact that he was suspended and therefore did not take his finals and therefore is getting incompletes in all his classes is what is preventing him from graduating. He will have to make up the classes and finals later (summer school) to get his diploma and will not be allowed to graduate with his class.

It sounds to like they’re trying to send a wider message and instill a fear of the church board in all the students and parents, rather than just trying to discipline this one young man.

I find it hard to believe this is the only decent private school in the area, if I were a parent with a child in this school I would be looking hard for a better place to educate my child.

Why is it so hard for churches today to handle church discipline properly? It seems churches today either have no discipline that they try to impose or they go the other way (like this) and give Christianity a bad rap to all unbelievers. I’ve had so many people assume that because I’m Christian I agree with this church’s actions.
dave on Fri, May 22, 2009

It’s a stupid reason to not let the teen graduate. If he handled the situation properly, which he did, then why punish him?

I see this as a struggle, temptation, whatever you call it. But as long as he did not sin and was able to do what’s right, then why treat him like this?

LOL, I can just imagine the staff in that Christian school doing the same.. probably listening to rock music on their ipods or something.

Dave