Is it Time to Leave? Assessing Your Compatibility of Background
- Posted by: Todd
- Posted on: Tue, January 11, 2005
- Viewed 96
- (22) comments so far
John says, "Flexibility is a valuable characteristic for pastors. Becoming all things to all people for the gospel's sake is important in discipleship (1 Corinthians 9:19-23). However, we can flex only so much. Each of us carriers certain economic, geographic and social imprints that affect receptivity of our ministry. The more closely these backgrounds match the congregation we serve, the more likely the chance for deeper understanding and cooperation within the church."
This, of course is easier said than done. There are literally thousands of mis-matched pastors serving in churches all across the country. Why? I think one of the main reasons is that it is many times hard to decipher the DNA of a local congregation totally during the interview process. It is difficult during a couple short interviews for the prospective staff member to totally discern whether or not he is a good fit for this individual body of Christ; and it is difficult for the church to know whether or not the prospective staff member shares their specific vision, values, and mission.
I'd love to hear your comments today! Here are a couple of different questions.
First of all, if you are in a mis-match situation; how did it happen? Was it something that could have been avoided if something had been done differently during the interview process?
And secondly, for those of you who have survived a mis-match situation and are now in a place well-suited to your skills and personality: What did you do to avoid another mis-match?
This should prove for some informative and lively discussion. I hope you'll join in!
Please leave your comments now!
This week, we’ll pick up in on our continuing look at John Cionca’s book "Before You Move: A Guide to Making Transitions in Ministry." This week we’ll begin to look at some Pastor/People signals; today discussing how to discern your "Compatability of Background". In this area John reinforces how each pastor and each church is different. Some pastors are fun-loving; others are more serious. Some pastors have a large city background; some hail from a small town; some pastors feel more comfortable in jeans; others in suits…
-----
Comments
if you want a Globally Recognized Avatar (the images next to your profile) get them here. Once you sign up, they will displayed on any website that supports them.
Al on Tue, January 11, 2005
“Why? I think one of the main reasons is that it is many times hard to decipher the DNA of a local congregation totally during the interview process.”
This is a very good point. Do you think this is even more of a problem with non-denominational churches; i.e. independent churches?
Todd Rhoades on Tue, January 11, 2005
I’m not sure whether it’s a bigger problem in non-denominationals or not… but I do think that one of the reasons is that many times churches during the interview process portray themselves as they would like or hope to be. Prospective employees probably do the same. http://www.mondaymorninginsight.com/images/smileys/smile.gif
jo on Tue, January 11, 2005
I think you hit it right on the nose-portray themselves as they would like or hope to be.” I think what’s really key to getting “the right match” is for everyone-interviewer and interviewee-to be completely honest and up front; ae. why did the last person quit?..etc. I believe sometimes what happens is both sides actually get so frustrated with the interview process itself that sometimes a choice is made just for the sake of getting it all over with. When we look for what we think is best for us, and don’t rely on God’s timing and plan, that’s when things get messed up.
Here’s a thought-anyone ever thought of after being interviewed by the “interview team” asking for a church directory and just calling “Joe Average” and see what they think about the church and the leaders in general? I wonder what kind of response you’d get from people not on the “A” list of people to talk to.
This is what I did the last time I was interviewed. I asked several people individually to give me the reason that particular church existed. If everyone is clear on the vision and purpose of the church itself, everything else seems to fall into place.
BTW-the next time I’ll make sure when I’m being interviewed I’m not attending a luncheon for the last person being let go (actually she was cleaning out her office while the staff had lunch a few feet away-very uncomforatable). Not a great way to start…
Rob on Tue, January 11, 2005
Never accept verbal promises and commitments! Get everything in writing. I was hired by a large pentecostal church although I made it very clear I am not a practicer of the “sign gifts.” The senior pastor said that didn’t matter at all, since we agreed on the basics of faith. He promised compensation after a six-month conditional period. A year of free labor later (and still no compensation, no performance review, no feedback at all), he reversed course and denied that he had offered compensation and said the church couldn’t afford me anyway since they needed to build an annex! Yes, the difference in practice made a huge difference to him (not me) and he came to view me (and to treat me) as inferior and untrustworthy since I didn’t do the charismatic things he did. In spite of my young adults ministry more than doubling in size in 12 months (40 to 100) and greatly growing in effectiveness and impact, he let me go. Still no compensation. Said it was because I might be more fulfilled elsewhere.
I guess my main lesson is to never give service to a church unless I’ve been fellowshipping there long enough to know the church well and the other leaders well. I don’t agree with today’s practice of hiring leaders from elsewhere and bringing them in. The biblical pattern is to train your replacement and for churches to grow their leaders from within. If your pastor isn’t making disciples (training them one-on-one), he’s not doing his job!
Pastor Al on Tue, January 11, 2005
Rob,
I say you have a good point as well as a sad story. I agree with your thoughts about attending the fellowship for a period of time, before making a decision about Pastoring there, however, in most cases this is very hard to do.
What do you and Todd think about getting a list of people to interview who attend and who do not attend the church any longer?
When it comes to Denominations, the only advantage I can see, from a pastor’s perspective, is that one can “ask around” about the church to see what their reputation is.
Harry Miller on Tue, January 11, 2005
For me the most important thing is what God thinks.
Pastor John on Tue, January 11, 2005
I moved to a church in the Midwest from the Southwest about 5 1/2 years ago to serve as a Senior Pastor. In some ways it has been a mismatch. However, if one has the mindset of a missionary, and God has called you to that place you must believe in your calling and learn the new culture. Was not Paul a “mismatch” to the Gentiles. We can become all things to all people so that we might reach some.
Rev. G. on Tue, January 11, 2005
This article was quite provacative and it caused me to think about a recent employment that went sour. Oral promises were made for dual employment. I decided that since I had never worked in such an environment it was better for me to understand the “congregational DNA” by attending services for a while before taking up my charge as Youth Pastor. This was agreed upon by both parties. However, it soon became apparent that the first charge was honored and it was said that the second agreement was never made. Rather than honoring requests for dialogues, I was given “prophetic words” during services about the many things that the Lord had brought me to the congregation for, with the intention to elevate me in the future. (Obviously, the second agreement was not one of them.) Needless to say this relationship ended after two years.
Diane on Tue, January 11, 2005
Interesting reading…
I was discipled by my pastor, licensed to the ministry and allowed to minister in my home church. The pastor left and it was apparent that a loud minority wanted me gone too. After much pain and persecution, I left. I went from a traditional/denominational church to a nondenominational/charismatic church. Since I am gifted, I fit the DNA. However, my giftedness was a threat to the pastor and his failure to keep our “employment” arrangement ended that term. I returned to a traditional/denominational church and everything was going great - until the pastor left. Unfair expectations were being placed on me as I was bi-ministry and unable to cover pastoral duties in both places. Also, the Spirit-led movement for change, which I was called to facilitate, was stopped the minute the pastor resigned. So, I left. It’s been over a year now and I still search for a church to call “home”. I tried returning to my home church but quickly realized I wasn’t wanted back as some consider me to be a “flaming charismatic” now. I’ve sent so many resumes I’ve lost count - to churches and secular jobs. It’s been a long night of weeping - looking forward to joy in the morning. And looking for my place in this world!
Dave on Tue, January 11, 2005
I would definitely have to agree on a few of the earlier comments as I have recently left from a position I was at only after a short time. One was that I think that when I interviewed the interviewing people were looking ahead to what they wanted the church to be but not where it was right then. Also the groups that interviewed me seemed to be of the same general mindset of the church although there was quite a big portion that was not represented during that interviewing time. I have also learned that I need to really clarify what churches mean by when they say they are “Liberal” or “Conservative”. During the interviewing process I made it known that I was more of an evangelical conservative stance and asked what was the churches stance. I was assured several times that the church was conservative and it just showed me that my idea of conservative and others can be quite different even when you are not extreme either way. In all of these situations I don’t think that I was purposefully led astray or deceived I believe that the church is a good church it was just not right for my wife. Unfortunately for the church and us we did not discover this during the interview process.
Dave on Tue, January 11, 2005
Wanted to clarify for the earlier comment it was not a good fit for my wife and I. Sorry deleted the last part when I was editing it http://www.mondaymorninginsight.com/images/smileys/smile.gif Sorry for any confusion
Stephen on Tue, January 11, 2005
I am really interested in the last thing Todd mentioned about MinistryKeys from ChurchStaffing. Do you have any idea when that might be available? I am currently in a ministry search where that could be very helpful. Thanks!
Bernie Dehler on Tue, January 11, 2005
It’s hard to imagine how the fit can be so bad, and not apparent through an interview process. I seriously think it’s more an issue of “getting along,” and lack of good leadership skills… maybe even as basic as a problem in acquiring the love of Jesus…
...Bernie
http://www.oneplace.com/ministries/247
Dave on Tue, January 11, 2005
I think in a world where everything is perfect then things will always work out but even in an interview process people will say things they hope they can do someday even if it is not where they are right now. In most peoples cases the interview is alot of meet these people they help with the youth you talk to them and they say how much they can’t wait till they have a youth leader to lead the youth ministry but what it may mean is that they want a manager to do all the things they want to do. You are definitely not going to hear that in an interview process. What if a church in an interview tells you how they want you to really share the gospel with the youth in the community during the interview process but what that really means is cater to the youth in our church and make them happy. There are many things that can be said during the interview process between the candidate and the church that even though they are well intentioned unfortunately are not always true. It is not like you get a couple weeks to visit and stay at the church and really see what it is like after the honeymoon period is over at best you probably have a weekend unless you live close by. I think one of the main problems is that the church needs to be honest with who they are, what they are looking for and stick to it and not be swayed because someone might have one more year of education or have had 15 more kids in the previous youth group. In reading a book called courageous leadership by Bill Hybels three characteristics for churches to look for when finding a employee Character, Competence, and Chemistry. The questions of their walk with Christ, their integrity, the ability to perform the job, and the way they would fit into that church. I am young and am still learning everyday. When I interviewed at my previous employer they told me that I asked more questions than all the other candidates combined! I wanted to do my best to try to find the right fit for my family. Even though it sounded good from a distance when I got in the position my family knew that it was not the place for us. I think it is easy to look at the situation and say you must have done something wrong but that is not always the case. Sometimes both parties can be as careful as they want to be and things just not work out.
Rusty on Wed, January 12, 2005
Great opinions. Here is my opinion; In college they taught us how to resolve a chord but not how to resolve conflict with the Pastor. I took my own counsel. I went to the Pastor with my “concerns”. I have been here 5 years, the dropping point for most staff members. Our Choir has tripled. The special music is blessed. Or orchestra still small but dynamic. Our congregational music is up beat and connected BUT the Pastor doesn’t like me,period. The assoc Pastor told me, “you don’t get it do you, he doesn’t like you and neither does his family so you are finished”. His opinion was insightful but I asked where is the spiritual reference here? Answer-laughter. That is the problem. Contracts won’t happen, in most cases, until ALL of the applicants ask for one. A Pastor or a “CEO”. I went to the Pastor with the missing elements of the empty promises and after two hours of “discussions” I tendered my resignation. He got a troubled look and I think he thought he would have trouble himself with the church if I wasn’t here Sunday morning. So he quickly about-faced and offered to fix the holes. 3 months later no repairs so, I either leave or stay and be disrespected. Three other staff members have left. They were replaced in weeks. The new employees received a “Honeymoon” then it set in on them that a mistake had been made. As long as the Public Relations effort of the Pastor works with the congregation Night follows Day. I asked the Lord and He will not permit me to leave. His will never takes us to a place where His grace cannot keep us. Holding On!
Page 1 of 2 pages 1 2 >
Post a Comment