Todd:

This is one of those instances where you have stacked the deck in order to get a particular response.  Anyone with an opinion other than what you have stated is “automatically” wrong.  You have taken one case and superimposed it over the whole.

If the ones who are coming in are unsaved and they are dressed “inappropriately” that’s one thing.  But when they claim to know Jesus and have come to worship the living God that’s quite another story altogether.

I draw the line between “casual” and “sloppy”.  Unfortunately that is a rather subjective line.  My casual and your sloppy may collide.

I don’t think it’s about dress codes as much as it is about attitude.  As some one to observe a minimal “dress code” and see what kind of attitude they portray.  That ought to settle it right there.

Hey Bart and JL,

I agree with you both… I always cry for ‘balance’.

Maybe my wording wasn’t right or balanced in the article or in my comments.  Of course, I think some dress is inappropriate.  And I don’t go to church in my yard weed-eating clothes.

My problem is with churched people who look down on others because of the way they dress.  Then to blame the devil for it.

I’ve met people like this.  In my experience, they are older folk who are more worried about dress than they are about souls.

This may be an over-statement, yet my experience.

What’s yours?

Todd

There are really layers of issues involved in this situation.  One is modesty, another is respect, and yet another is relevance and tolerance.  While I strongly prefer casual dress, I recognize that others struggle with balancing all of the issues involved.  On the one hand, I firmly believe that we “can approach the throne of grace with confidence,” and believe that “the Lord looks on the heart”.  On the other hand, I understand and appreciate that we are approaching the “Holy of Holies” and ought to do so with the utmost reverence and respect.  However, I doubt that those who are in the “respectful attire” crowd put their suits on at home when engaging in their personal prayer time.  Should we as believers dress modestly?  Absolutely, there is definite scriptural support for modesty.  Should we look down on the unbelievers amongst us when they come dressed immodestly?  I would hope that our priority would be their relationship with Jesus; the rest would then come with time.  If the devil’s bringing them to my church, I say, bring them on!

I think a danger can be in assessing what is casual and what is sloppy is that sloppy clothes may be all some people can afford and it has nothing to do with being saved or unsaved.  Not to say a poor person can’t come to church clean but sometimes that one stained t-shirt which you wouldn’t dream of wearing to church is all they have.  Being judgemental about a person’s dress style I think is abhorrant to the Lord.  Of course modesty is important; I don’t want my husband confronted with a low-cut blouse on the front row as he leads worship, but in my experience as a person grows in Christ conviction over those things happens naturally.  When I first got saved I was a teenager from a working class (unsaved) family and only had one ‘dressy’ outfit.  The Church I was attending however had the fashion parade contingent there every week and was a very disheartening time for me as I couldn’t possibly compete.  After a year I was lead to a church where jeans and t-shirts were welcomed on Sundays if that’s what you were comfortable in.  Nowadays as a stay-at-home Mom I enjoy dressing up for church but don’t condemn anyone for coming in shorts.

At the risk of being misunderstood, I’ll take the chance.  Don’t you think that it is ironic that God included a whole list of things in the furnishings of the Tabernacle/Temple including rules for priestly attire?

I can already here it coming.  That was life under the Law, we’re no longer under the Law!  While the letter of the Law kills the Spirit of the Law brings life.  The Spirit of the Law states that we are to approach God in a particular manner.

I wish it were true that what you wear doesn’t matter.  My experience, confirmed by many of my colleagues, is that casual attire (I’m talking the short shorts, flip flops and tank tops crowd) often reflects itself in casual worship.

I don’t wear a suit and tie all the time.  I wear guayaberas and nice slacks all summer and a polo and sport jacket most of the rest of the year.  For weddings, funerals, child dedications etc. I will don a tie but not because it is expected as much as it is because it is appropriate.

I have been around a while now and I see how the casual approach has resulted in people bringing their starbucks, fruit lunches, bottled waters, flip flops and tank tops down another notch with every passing week.  Where is the limit?

I don’t advocate stiff dressing up, but there is a big difference between casual and sloppy and a lot of people don’t know that difference.

I don’t care how an unbeliever dresses, but I am concerned about the attitudes of some believers that anything goes.

Let me repeat myself again.  Ask the “casual” dresser to kick it up a notch and note their response.  Their attitude will pretty much answer your questions as to what is at issue.  Is it about appropriateness or just doing your own thing and to heck with anybody elses feelings? God loves us as we are, but loves us too much to leave us that way.

Okay this is sad. I had to look up “guayaberas”. Which gives you a clue that I don’t wear them. Do I wear a suit? Yup - have for 25 years. Old dog - new clothes thing. But I am not concerned about what people wear to church, unless it is so revealing that that is a distraction. But that almost never happens. Clothes are near the bottom of my concerns on Sunday, there are too many other items which grab my attention and energy.

I have no problem with how people dress… my issue is that this discussion is being had in an open forum… the dear abby column is not where people need to be having this fight.  I know that my sister reads dear abby, and in the past has made a comment about something stupid that a person who identifies themselves as a christian has said.  This has not helped her outlook on christianity, and i see this as being just another thing that is going to affect her view of the church as a bunch of kooks who are pretty unwelcoming and close minded. 

I am amazed by the ways that we stir up our own problems.

The difference between JL and Layne’s approach has to do with WHAT THE SUNDAY MORNING GATHERING IS.  Pardon the caps, but I think this is really the crux of the issue.  If it’s for believers, and we are entering the presence of the Lord as believers, then how we are approach the Lord is important (the most important, of course, is the heart--but that doesn’t mean that clothes are unimportant) enough to warrant our attention.  If it’s to make non-believers and believers mingle, that is, if it’s sort of the ‘entrance point’ into the Church, then perhaps there should be less of an emphasis on kinds of clothing, and only a minimal hope that people (viz. regular attenders) would refrain from dressing in distracting (/immodest) ways.
Would anybody else agree that our view of what Sunday morning’s are about informs our views on dress??
Anyone?

Hey Camey! You may have missed my point above about wearing a tie.  I rarely do.  But I thought your response was really funny

Daniel:  I agree with you about it being the purpose of the Sunday service.  Even though in the most seeker friendly environments the vast majority of people (I’d guess about 95% or more) are believers.  If it is truly an evangelism outreach, usually most effective when done outside the church building anyway, then I certainly would agree that no thought ought to be given about how the target audience dresses. But even under those circumstances does it really not matter what professing believers are wearing (again modest and casual vs. questionable and sloppy)

Randy: My point exactly.  Did you ever notice that the people dressing down have as much of an attitude as those who complain?  That’s why I tend to try to deal with the real issue as I see it.  It is about the heart.  And the heart that says, “I’ll wear what I want to wear when I want to wear it and it’s nobodies business but God’s” is missing the point altogether. An appropriate response would be, am I creating an unnecessary distraction?

There is just as much potential for abuse when someone wears a suit and tie as when they wear shorts and flip-flops. 

God is still with us even when we are not in the sanctuary. Do we need holy underwear, lest He be embarassed?

I am sorry but I have to say this, WE ARE MISSING IT!  How can it matter what people wear?  This discussion is why so many people have turned away from church and therefore from God because we have let religion get in the way of relationship.

Let’s get out of our own way and show the world that God loves them by us loving each other.  If you wear a tie and I wear flip flops who cares.  The fact is we worship the same God and the world needs to see us accepting each other like Christ accepts us so they know He will accept them no matter what they wear or what they’ve done.  We have sent the message that you have to be a certain way before you can come to Christ and do certain things that is scares people and they don’t come and then they don’t hear and then they die without knowing the God that I know loves me even though I don’t deserve it and even though I was messed up when I came to Him.

Anyway, let’s get out there and show people (even believers) that God loves them and quit giving them reasons to stay away.

*wear, not where*

Point taken Daniel.  I guess I should have been clear on what I meant by missing it.  I agree this blog is here to help us lead and to think of things in different ways and get different viewpoints.  My point was that what someone wears has nothing to do with their relationship with Christ, so maybe we should focus more on issues that either help someone discover that relationship or grow that relationship. 

As to your questions, 1) I think we are just welcoming all the time regardless of what they wear or what they say we are welcoming.  2) Sunday’s for us are always about the outsider.  We try to create and environment where outsiders are welcome and insiders feel comfortable inviting their outsider friends.  A place where they are comfortable and open to the Holy Spirit working both in the outsider as well as the insider.  3) And no you don’t tell the senior to get a life.  I give them my answer to question 2.  We are doing are best to create an environment where the Holy Spirit is freed up to do what only He can do.

I hope that makes sense.  I didn’t mean to come across rude or insensitive in my first post and if I was I apologize.