D ear David,

I will pray that no one you ever truly love must suffer the agony of an abusive relationship; because brother, yours is exactly the attitude which causes vicitims to leave the Body of Christ.

As a social worker before ministry, I had the horrifying task of going with a woman to see her pastor. She had just finished spending approx. 2 weeks in the hospital--four days were in the ICU--after being beaten by her husband. Her pastor informed her that as the head of the household he had a right to discipline her & that she needed to be submissive and if he beat her again, she should pray for strength to endure.

Considering the fact that our Lord Jesus reached out to those who were marginalized; turned the legal code of Moses upside down and ministered to those who were not married in the understanding of the temple (the woman at the well); I have faith that the Lord’s ideal for marriage is not bound in legalism but in the Divine, biblical and Christ like model of servant leadership as explained in the original languages--not the distorted translation given to the people by King James. I prefer the original languages of scripture as given to us by the King of Kings,

Dear David,

I ask for your prayers as well.

I believe that scripture is indeed the Word of God; moreover, I do indeed look at the original languages and context, as shown in my first post.

I do not think that quoting the original language and understanding the nuances therein as I quoted them are figurative. Indeed, I would commend to all who are reading this post the book, “What Paul Really Said About Women,” by Rev. John Temple Bristow. Bristow offers an indepth study which employs the original languages & contexts.

And yes, I have been in an abusive marriage. One I remained in for over twelve years because I believed that as a good Christian I should not get divorced. That marriage was demoralizing and degrading and did not emulate the model of marriage as mandated in scripture, Abusive relationships are a form of abandonment--perhaps not physically/literally--but abondonment nonetheless.

Christ was not a literalist, yet when we try to be literal with the Word of God, even though Christ himself was not, we do more harm than good to the furthering of the Gospel.

Let us just agree to disagree brother, because we will not change one another’s minds. But we can hold one another in prayer--that is a literal model given to us by Christ--one I will follow and obey.

Blessings.

David
No one is saying that, at least I am not. When it gets right down to it, God does hate divorce, We look for to many loop holes to escape our vows, there I agree with you 100% we should be working on preserving what “God has put together” Some times I wonder if God is the one who put some of these Marriages together. “Be not unequally yolked with an unbeliever” He expects us to take our vows seriously.
Another study in Scripture is of the Character of God.
“God has called us to peace” “Love thinks no evil”
God delivers His children ...many passages in the psalms. God gives us common sense and wisdom, We are responsible for the safety of our children, if their lives are in danger don’t you think that the way God may deliver them might just be to get out of that situation? God is a God of reconciliation, We should try to be reconciled, it may take repentance and Godly council along with accountability. if the abuser doesn’t agree with these or refuses, Its just my way of thinking but I would write him off as a unbeliever, Look at 1 John 3:14,15 &1;John 4:7,8,&20;. I think the principle here is a “Real” Christian doesn’t act in Hate and beat Their spouse and children. And therefore 1 Cor. 7 tells us if the unbeliever depart, let them go. Are not acts of violence and hatred a departure from your vows to love and to cherish? also revealing your true nature? maybe I am wrong, I’ll change my view when God convicts me that I am wrong.

I am a pastor with Calvary Chapel and we tend to try to be pretty Biblical in our approach, like the rest of you folks in here. Having said that, I have a zero tolerance policy when it comes to domestic physical abuse. So, if a woman gets hit or is in danger then the man moves out...That is common sense and good counsel. Seperation over these matters is a must to protect the genuine victim.
Secondly, if a man is harming his wife physically and it is a legitimate issue which will not be stopped after confrontation and hopeful restoration...I would definitely consider abuse as abandonment from a Biblical perspective. If a wife cannot live with her husband due to abuse then He has abandoned the marriage quite clearly…

great thank u
love it

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