Pastors in Rehab

Orginally published on Wednesday, December 08, 2004 at 9:29 AM
by Todd Rhoades

Any thoughts on this article, (by Hazel Trice Edney from Atlanta Daily World)?  Clergy counsel their congregations in times of distress, but to whom do they turn in their time of need?  When you are serving a large group of people, it is an emotionally draining exercise," Interdenominational Theological Center President Dr. Michael A. Battle said. "Ministers are constantly in a giving mode, so it is difficult for them to be on the receiving end of compassion…

Rev. Kenneth Dennis is a prime example. He seemed to have it all. At 38, he was the successful pastor of the socially active Greater Mount Moriah Baptist Church in Richmond, Va.

    That was 10 years ago. Now, Dennis could be headed for a jail. Twice convicted of drunk driving and once convicted of cocaine-possession over the past seven months, he has attended a string of court hearings and enrolled in drug and alcohol rehabilitation.

    Similar stories are repeated throughout the country, leaving behind devastated wives and families, angry and divided congregations, preachers fighting their own leadership boards and ending in tortured personal humiliation and self-loathing.  Atlanta is no exception.

    Issues involving family and finances may push clergy into counseling, Battle said.

    "After their children grow up and leave, and they look back over their lives, some clergy realize they were more present for their members' children than their own children," he said.  "They go through a period of regret.

    "Another frustration for some clergy is financial issues," Battle continued.  "Most ministers are not well off and may make incomes that barely make ends meet."

   And, too often they feel isolated, with nowhere to turn.

    Fear is one reason why some clergy do not seek counseling, he said.

     "Some congregations have created a perfect image of their minister," Battle said.  "If a minister reveals a problem, then he may fear he will be abandoned by his congregation.

    "Some ministers do not even talk to other clergy but rather carry their burden alone," he continued.

    Battle suggests several coping mechanisms for clergy.

    "They should establish close, confidential relationships with other ministers who are academically trained in pastoral counseling," he said.  "Ministers should establish relationships with ministers from other denominations.

    "They should have confidence in the ability of well-trained pastoral counselors," Battle continued.

    Clergy's myriad responsibilities may also factor into the need for counseling, Providence Missionary Baptist Church Senior Pastor Rev. Dr. Gerald L. Durley said.

    "You are often counseling people who are dealing with a great deal of stress such as a death in the family or loss of a job," he said.  "This is not just a Sunday morning job. 

    "This is a 7 days a week, 24 hours a day kind of job," Durley continued.  "You are always on call."

    Durley, who is also a licensed psychologist, suggests clergy should develop more stress relieving techniques to handle an often demanding profession.

    "Every pastor needs a pastor," he said.  "Someone in whom they have total confidence, someone who will tell them, in a loving and supportive way, the truth about what they are going through and someone who will be able to objectively reflect on their situation. 

    "Pastors must take time out for themselves.  It will give them a new sense of refreshment," he continued.  "Finally, and this is critical, pastors must keep a sense of humor and be able to laugh at themselves.  This relieves stress so as to allow God to work through them."   

    The issue of clergy in need of counseling is an epidemic, Bishop T.D. Jakes said in an interview.    

    "Most clergy become clergy because they feel called to make a difference and they have passion for people in pain because they've been there themselves," he said.  "But just because a doctor is a physician doesn't mean that he can't get the flu.

   Jakes organized a three-day pastors' conference in September and called it "Leading While Bleeding." It drew more than 6,000 clerics from across the country to his Potter's House in Dallas.

        Hundreds of ministerial leaders stepped forward at the Jakes conference, confessing to weaknesses, failures and sins that they would normally preach about to their congregations.  Following the conference, Jakes has been directing pastors to the American Association of Christian Counselors (AACC) in Forest, Va., which has a network of 7,000 counselors across the country.

    Dennis, the pastor from Richmond, said he feels better now that he has no more secrets about his lifestyle. His congregation voted to keep him as pastor. "I've lost a bunch of so-called friends," he said. "I don't get to preach at other churches anymore. Other than that, I'm okay."

    Jakes said pastors play a special role in Black America.

    "The Black community has never had a president, only a preacher. And from Frederick Douglass to Martin Luther King to Jesse Jackson to Al Sharpton to T. D. Jakes, it doesn't matter who you want to name, they're always clergy," he said. "And so, if we lose our clergy, what then? We must preserve them. And when they're sick, we must heal them. And when they're broken, we must fix them."

      The "Leading While Bleeding" conference was just a beginning, Jakes said.

    He plans to build a center where troubled pastors and their spouses can get help out of the public spotlight.

    "You can't just go to a secular place when you have a spiritual problem. You are a spiritual being so your [perspective] affects how you process sin, how you process marriage, how you process lust. It's all filtered through this religious filter," Jakes said. "And I would love to be a part of lighting a candle for pastors and their wives."

I'd love to hear your thoughts and comments!

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Hi... I'm Todd Rhoades. I'm a Christ-follower, husband, father and I love to connect leaders with other leaders. Hopefully you'll find something here at MMI you like and will return often. If you want, you can find out more about me or follow my every step on Twitter.

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