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The 2005 Evangelical Leadership Golf Tournament

Here’s something light to take us into the weekend. This comes from the Jim@Large blog: 2005 Pop Theology Golf Roster: (Relocated to Colorado Springs from Dallas)

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The 2005 Evangelical Leadership Golf Tournament

Ted Haggard, Public Relations Director

George Barna, Official Scorekeeper

1. Benny Hinn, who was disqualified last year for blowing on the ball.
2. Paul Crouch (the one in the french provincial golf cart).
3. Ralph Neighbor, who won?t play anything in groups larger than four.
4. Hal Lindsey, who disappeared on the 8th hole last year.
5. Joel Osteen, if he can produce ID showing he's old enough to play.
6. Rick Warren, playing with a nine-degree Purpose Driver.
7. Joyce Meyer. Hey are you going to tell her she can't play?
8. Bill Hybels, who wants to make the game fun for everyone!
9. Bill McCartney, who broke his promise to be here last year.
10. C. Peter Wagner, who insists the entire tournament can be finished today.

Dick Eastman is still praying about coming.

Hank Hanegraaff won't be playing, but will repair everyone else's ball marks.

Rick Joyner doesn't play, but claims he knows who's going to win.

Anyone have any additions you'd like to add to the lineup of this year's tournament?

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This post has been viewed 175 times and was added on June 24, 2005 by Todd Rhoades.

Filed under: Miscellaneous Church Leadership Humor

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- - - - - - - - - - TRACKBACKS: (0) There are 11 Comments:

Posted by

Saturday, June 25, 2005 at 1:24 AM

Famous blogger Todd Rhoades was supposed to make a surprise appearance but he got stuck in the blog, oops I mean bog! Maybe next year!
Posted by

Saturday, June 25, 2005 at 1:54 AM

Tim LaHaye and Jerry B.Jenkins were on their way to the tournament when they missed the bus and were left behind. Max Lucado would’ve been there but he had an appointment with the Savior next door. Neil Anderson had a devil of a time getting plane reservations. Henry Blackby was experiencing something new. Brian McLarson had some emerging to do… more updates coming soon!
Posted by

Saturday, June 25, 2005 at 2:17 AM

Just a few more and I will give this a rest. Ken Newberger said he would be available if any conflicts in scheduling arose. Someone named Ricky said the whole event was too organized for him. Ed Young said he was too old for such foolishness. The gay movement said they’d be happy to attend. Overall Thomas doubted that the event would even take place as Elijah has predicted rain.
Posted by Todd Rhoades

Saturday, June 25, 2005 at 8:17 AM

Thanks, kd… after a ‘rough’ couple of days here at the blog, you made my day!

Now if I could only get unstuck out of this bog…

Todd
Posted by

Saturday, June 25, 2005 at 11:12 PM

That was great KD. lol.

Todd, think positive about the bog, think positive… you’ll get out… lol
Posted by Todd Rhoades

Saturday, June 25, 2005 at 11:14 PM

Thanks, BeHim… if Robert Schuller were here I’m sure he could help me think more positively about getting out of this thing. Maybe someone should invite him.

Todd
Posted by

Saturday, June 25, 2005 at 11:24 PM

LOL. Just make sure you invite with something “crystal” involved.

Have a great weekend Todd.
Posted by

Sunday, June 26, 2005 at 1:05 AM

Quote:

“Someone named Ricky said the whole event was too organized for him.”

Is this supposed to be funny?
Posted by

Sunday, June 26, 2005 at 1:20 AM

Don’t worry Todd, John Piper said God is closer than you think. John Maxwell is leading a rescue party and Dr. Townsend and Clark are setting up boundaries so Stu Weber and his spirit warriors can rescue you. Dr. Phil is on his way in case you have sustained any injuries. Lee Strobel said you may have a case for litigation. Charles Swindol says you are made of tough stuff and John Bunyon said you are one great pilgrim. Stephen Arteburn is sure you will win this battle and Gary Chapman will help you if you have any language barriers explaining your predicament or rescue. There may be a book deal in all of this just ask the runaway bride! ps yes Rickt I thought that was funny!
Posted by bernie dehler

Sunday, June 26, 2005 at 2:15 AM

Billy Graham came in coordination with the local churches to get an 80K audience turn-out… and this may be his last tournament (again).

...Bernie
http://www.oneplace.com/ministries/247
Posted by

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I'm Todd Rhoades... the MMI guy. I'm also on the team at Leadership Network (although that doesn't mean that they endorse everything I write here). In my past life, I was the founder and developer of a website named ChurchStaffing.com.


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