The Silent Killer in Our Churches

Orginally published on Wednesday, June 20, 2007 at 6:55 AM
by Todd Rhoades

Many people in religious circles say it's one of the biggest problems facing families and congregations. Yet: It can go undetected. It has no outward signs. It is barely discussed. The culprit? Pornography. The Rev. Steven Showalter of Pure Morality Ministries calls it "the silent killer" in the church. "There are individuals in our churches who struggle with porn every day," he said. "They may be the piano player, the Sunday school teacher, the youth pastor and maybe even the pastor. "Pornography is much like carbon monoxide. Both are virtually undetectable, and both kill." Consider these statistics...

Fifty percent of all Christian men and 20 percent of all Christian women are addicted to pornography, according to a 2006 poll by ChristiaNet.

Thirty-three percent of pastors and 36 percent of laity admitted visiting a sexually explicit Web site, according to research published in 2006 by Christianity Today.

Fifty-seven percent of pastors said pornography was the most damaging sexual issue affecting their congregations, and 36 percent of congregants said it was the most damaging sexual issue affecting them personally, according to a 2005 survey published by Christianity Today International.

The two Kansas City, Mo., area Catholic bishops who are leading their dioceses in major anti-pornography campaigns say pornography is an attack on God’s gift of sexuality, on human dignity and on marriages and families.

“When our sexuality is misused and trivialized, as it is so often in our culture, it becomes a destructive force that causes worry, anxiety, a sense of being used and abused,” said Archbishop Joseph F. Naumann of the Archdiocese of Kansas City in Kansas.

Pornography is an easy problem to hide, Showalter said. One reason is its easy access on the Internet.

“What used to be behind the counter now is on the Internet and cable television and handheld devices like iPods and cell phones,” said Phillip Cosby, executive director of the Kansas City office of the National Coalition for the Protection of Children and Families.

It used to be that some people had Playboy in their homes, said the Rev. Ken Lightcap, pastor of Nall Avenue Church of the Nazarene in Prairie Village.

“Then the Internet hit,” he said. “So everyone lives with a virtual box of Playboys in their house, and the Internet is not going anywhere.”

Religious faith does not exempt a person from struggling with pornography. If anything, a person’s faith often creates another problem, that of guilt or shame.

“The Bible says God created the man and woman and they were naked and not ashamed,” Lightcap said. “Pornography introduces shame.”

Looking lustfully at a person offends God, said Richard Land, president of the Southern Baptist Convention’s Ethics and Religious Liberty Commission, who calls pornography “Satan’s corruption of God’s design for us as sexual beings.”

He said Jesus warns against the subtle dangers of pornography in Matthew 5:28: “But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”

“Our sexuality is to be constrained by and conducted within the confines of a marriage relationship that honors God,” Land said. “Anything else is an affront to God and a short step to the destruction of your family and your marriage.”

Lightcap believes that pornography is the greatest spiritual problem in men’s lives.

“It makes them live with a level of guilt and spiritual reticence,” he said. “Men don’t live with a vibrancy in their faith. It affects their ability to pray, to serve God and their community, to work in the church and to take the message into the world.”

And pornography can create a crisis of faith when “because of the nature of sin, it is not easy to break out of,” said David Wilson, general secretary of the Church of the Nazarene.

Laurie Fugate of Vineyard Christian Fellowship in Overland Park, Kan., who leads two groups for wives of men addicted to sex and pornography, and her husband, Steve, who leads two groups of men with these problems, want to see similar groups in every section of the area “because the problem is huge,” she said.

For many men, confidentiality is important.

“Pastors of other churches refer people, so they have anonymity at this church since it isn’t their church,” said the Rev. Clark Armstrong, pastor of Victory Hills, where eight to 10 men meet weekly.

“Pornography can be a problem among clergy, and they have no one to whom they can turn,” said the Rev. Jeren Rowell, Kansas City district superintendent for the Nazarene Church. “So the district is trying to develop a process, like an annual checkup, that would identify areas (including pornography) where clergy need help, and they would be able to get help confidentially.”

Seaborn, who is president of Winning at Home ministry, said the best help congregations can offer is to provide an accountability partner to each person with a pornography problem. The partner would help the person keep his commitment to stay away from Internet sites, magazines, videos and other places where pornography is found.

Even though some congregations are doing something to help people addicted to pornography, much more needs to be done, Cosby said.

“There’s still a lot of denial about how deep the problem is,” he said. “Meanwhile people are suffering silently."---

More here...

I wonder what Bob Newhart would say?

FOR DISCUSSION? How big of a problem has internet pornography posed in your ministry?  Is it a big thing that you counsel on?  Has it affected any of your staff or leaders?  How are you dealing with, and how do you safeguard yourself and your leaders?

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