I don’t know if mine qualifies as a “horror story”, but I’d been pastoring a small church that God caused to explode.  When I came there were 40 people in worship and less than two years later we were averaging around 250 in two services.

I thought everything was going great, until I began to be attacked.  Apparently, some of the original members, even those on the committee that called me, decided they didn’t like all these new people changing “their church”.

Over the course of the next year I was told to “go back to the town the seminary was in that I attended” even though this was my home town.  I was told by the Chairman of the Deacons that “we could keep seeing people saved, but we need to send them somewhere else”.  I had another deacon say that he was going to do whatever it took to run me off and ruin my name so no other church would touch me.

All this came to a head and I took two weeks off, after being accosted on a Sunday Morning, in the sanctuary, by the Chairman of Deacons.  I went to another town the next day to begin my “vacation” and was called by another deacon who told me that several of the power-brokers were trying to get out of paying me for my two weeks of vacation.

I was hurt, but my wife was devastated by all this.  We seriously thought about leaving the ministry, but a year later, I’m still there.  Most of the those who caused me trouble have left the church, though they still try to defame myself and the church in our small town.

We lost many people, especially those who were young Christians and got caught in the crossfire.  But God is good and we are growing again, seeing people’s lives changed, and experiencing His grace.

Hmmm… we’ve got a few. That said, we also could tell stories of lovely people who have given and given and given to us because they believed in us and what God was doing.

So, that said, my youth pastor of 4 years ended up being a molester.  It was a large ministry and he targeted young girls (my friends!) who were from outside the church core families to prey upon.

The church didn’t handle it well and never came out with the full story, so there are still people out there who believe that he was the innocent victim.
But I know because the D.A. called me to ask if I had been molested by him.  This was a very prominent ministry that was being observed by people all over the country to find out how they did it.  Sad.  That said, looking back I can see his internal struggle.  And I really think he was trying to fight his immorality and eventually just gave in. 

The first ministry we went to canned us, because basically the parents there really just weren’t believers.  The did the church thing, but they didn’t want their kids TOO involved.  But that said, we left 35 new believers behind, even though the pastor wouldn’t cover our backs and basically gave into peace at any price.  That ministry still struggles and goes through a youth pastor every two years.
But we are still going strong in ministry.

The church we’re at now is a restart and the first three years were literally hell on earth.  The same old story, people who say they want the church to grow and they have a heart for seeing the lost come to Christ, but really they just want things to stay the same and when change comes they fight it.

But we’re older and wiser now, and just smarter in how we deal with these folks.  And now they are gone and we have a growing church.

People are people.  Most aren’t all good or bad.  All of us like to believe we are right and all of us at one time or another are deceived or deceive ourselves.  So, I try to measure out grace even to the undeserving.  Church is a place for the wounded.  And hurt people, hurt people that’s for sure.

But I love ministry.  And there’s nothing I’d rather be doing.

Todd, thank you for featuring my book, Not of My Making. You are absolutely right that problems of bullying, scapegoating and misconduct occurs in all churches regardless of whether they are considered mainline, mainstream or evangelical. I also assume the problem exists in synagogues and mosques. People are people and people sin.
In my own experience it took me by surprise that adults who were good people could be so mean. I thought I left that behind when I graduated from high school. I was so naive.
The stories of growing churches echo my own experience. The people who have been members of a dying church resist growth even though they say they want it. I believe if the leadership had been educated about this phenomenon during our leadership seminar many of the problems could have been averted. I didn’t need to be run out of the church and blacklisted in all the other churches in my community. I, too, pray for all the people who injured me and hope they will gain insight into their behavior.
My book, Not of My Making, is available from http://www.pluckpress.com or Amazon.com

Lawyer with a Gun,

I just want to bless you for saying that you are always prayerful about your decisions.

And I wanted to quote my first Boss when I was 17 who always said “It’s not what you do, it’s how you do it”.  There is much wisdom in that.

If you deny or rebuke someone in love it makes all the difference.  God Bless you!

CindyK,

Thanks for your kind and encouraging words.  Your story was encouraging because your committment to God was stronger than the hurt others caused you.  In the end, these experiences make us much stronger because we will ultimately focus on trusting God and yet, still loving his messengers.