Well thought out?  Never seen anyone do that before.  I think it is put pretty good.

[Please contact one of the pastors regarding your decision to move.]

Please allow me to suggest maybe the ministers (servants) contact the person leaving.

Why put an additional task on the shoulders of the person leaving… it seems to me like the person leaving is asked to take an extra step and “serve” the church with a reason for leaving.

Why not serve them and make an effort by taking time from a busy schedule (that we all have) and contact them.

Maybe this is all they need… to be appreciated enough that someone took the time to call and see if 1.  everything is okay and 2. why he/she/they quit attending

May we grow in the Grace and Knowledge of HIM; my friends.

Very good article.  The only thing I raise my eye-brow at is:
“Whether you worship at Emmanuel or another sister church is your decision, not ours.”

What’s a sister church? Another Baptist church? Sounds like they are too narrow-minded.  There’s much more other fine Christian groups out there besides just the Baptisits.

As for KD’s question, I’d advise to follow the Lord’s advice in Matt. 18 to resolve any disagreement OR sin.  It’s an awesome and simple process; just takes some spiritual maturity to carry out in truth and love and patience.

...Bernie
http://www.oneplace.com/ministries/247/

kd writes “What if there are hidden ministries within the church...”

I’ve seen something akin to this. You join or even agree to serve in a church that represents itself in one way, but over the course of time, they reveal that they have a very different philosophy of ministry in PRACTICE than they do in DESCRIPTION, i.e. their mission or vision statements, et cetera. And… that this practiced philosophy of ministry is not only contrary to what was stated up front, but is also, in your view and experience, ineffective or even dangerous. Now imagine you find that everybody in leadership except you is cool with that!

Sometimes it’s time to move on, even for a leader. It happens.

But my own experience is, very often a congregant will say they are moving on because they are “not being fed”. Very often some of these good people are, coincidentally, not really serving at all. I’ve found that mature Christians REALLY get fed by serving. And I’m not sure we get REALLY “fed” (John 4:34) any other way.

People leave for a variety of reasons. I could never keep up and if it’s against the pastor, they won’t tell the truth. I’ve had people leave because they finally figured out the mean spirit within the established families and the keeping out of newcomers. people leave because they discover that if they want to be a leader they have to fit the Biblical criteria and they are not willing to be that faithful. People leave when they learn that tithing or serious commitment is required and they have a consumer mentality, what will you do for me, kind of attitude. people leave because the church they have in mind is small and the pastor should visit and that doesn’t fit the Biblical model, nor is it possible in a 500 to 800 member/worshipping congregation. People leave because the pastor can’t remember everybody’s name or doesn’t say the right thing in the pulpit. People leave because you are now using video, people leave because you pray for one another, people leave because you don’t talk about the end times, or spiritually speak in tongues, or you do, or you are prophetic and make comments about their lifestyle. I can’t imagine people writing to the church to explain the real reason, but that would be nice.

I think Jay hit it on the head , I was really glad when some members left and felt sorry for the next pastor that got them.

I’ve only had a couple leave the church since I’ve been here (five years), and one of those made it clear why they left.

The other never said, but I could guess (a theological issue, mainly).  So I sent them a letter stating that if I had offended them, I would be glad to hear what it was, and if needed, ask for forgiveness.  But I also stated in the letter that I was not very good at “chasing” people who left, and didn’t feel the need to question the motives of adults who made such decisions.

Never heard from them, but not surprised, either.

I’m saddened when people leave, but also realize that our church is a good fit for some, and not for others.

Brian

Wow this gets my heart right now. I was at my present church 6 weeks when the bulk of the leadership walked out. Only one of them communicated in any way. A hand written letter slid under the door of my house followed by screeching tires in the street. I still don’t know why they left, but I do know they work the remaining crowd every saturday to hinder sunday attendance.

It has been just over two months since they left. The church has not recovered but I am glad they are gone.

The fact they did not talk to me, combined with thier actions since, tell me they all would have been even bigger problems down the road.

Yes I do feel sorry for the pastor where they all go together now. Give them a year and he will expirence a pain in the butt too!

And regardless of what my board has asked me to do...I WILL NOT CHASE THEM AND IF THEY TRY TO RETURN THE DOOR WILL BE CLOSED.

Some leavings are inevitable, due to theological issues, deep personal conflicts,etc. Sometimes people need to find something else when they are in a different place in life. A life-long pentecostal or baptist may end up yearning for the rich traditions and complex liturgy of the Episcopal Church.
However, there is too much blame placed on leavers. Pastors are too immature and defensive when it comes to the issue. The simple fact is that church mobility is addressed “ad nauseum” in the church growth and ecclesiology literature. Dr. Rev. Elder, or Mr. Pastor: if you don’t want members to leave your church, then make your church into one that people do not want to leave. It is as simple as all that. You don’t need to either chase or psychoanalyze someone who leaves your church-- look in the mirror.