Our church would not knowingly host a gay marriage. Our church would do a funeral for a gay person, but not in a way that is inconsistent with our values as a Christian church. If an alcoholic died, we wouldn’t show photos of him with bottle in hand.

The family/survivors wanted to bring in other people to direct the service and bring it’s message--people who were openly gay. No, we wouldn’t allow this. Every time I’ve held a funeral at church and the family wishes someone else to lead the service, that person chosen by the family has contact with me to be sure that the message going out is consistent with our church’s value. We are the body of Christ, not a funeral home.

Todd, please be aware that if the debate over wheter homosexuality is a sin or not gets heated, you will need your monkey pictures.

From the quotes that were included it sounded like the leadership of the congregation was offering the use of the building for a memorial service. No one from the leadership was participating in the service and the family was making the arrangements. Again, the only thing that this congregation was doing was allowing their building to be used. I don’t see a problem. Does this facility allow other events to be hosted there? If not then maybe they should have thought about what they were offering before they made the unconditional offer. I really think the “church” missed the point here, especially when they reneged their offer. When would you have a better opportunity to minister to people who are disconnected from church? Granted I don’t think anyone who have crossed the line of faith but I think they would have been moved closer.

Whatever your theological views on the issue of homosexuality, this one was handled so badly.  The result was a family and community who did not see the heart of Christ. They saw condemnation. That brings no honor to God. To say this was doing the right thing is hard for me to hear.

The most telling thing about this is that the people applauded the decision, as if, “yay, we kept the gay out!”

This is not a decision you make happily with applause.  If you make that decision, you should make it sadly with tears for those who will not understand and only interpret it as another case of Christian hypocrisy, and your congregation should understand that is with a heavy heart that the decision was made.

“it’s sad that we continue to take a couple of verses and condemn a small group of people who need understanding and compassion “

We do not condemn them...they condemn themselves. 

It is true that they need understanding...they need to understand that God loves them more than they can possibly understand and that it breaks His heart that they completely disrespect Him and worship their sexual appetite more than Him.

Whether we like it or not God is the boss and we must obey Him and trust Him or face the undesired consequences that go along with rebelling against God.

People don’t go to hell because they are gay. They go to hell for rejecting Jesus as saviour and Lord (Boss). 

Being gay is a product of sin and its effect on humanity; and living to serve the fallen adamic nature which is perverse and self serving. We all have a version of that nature that we are born with.  The rest of us simply have more socially acceptable sins that we have to overcome.  The point is this: we all have sins that need to be forgiven.  God can and will forgive us if we ask Him to and decide to live our lives in a way that seeks to do His will.

Be blessed.

Jeremy,
If they had a service celebrating gluttony, (not the same as being fat by the way, but thanks for labeling all fat people as gluttons.) then that would be wrong too.  Likewise of the alcoholic had lived his life in rebellion to God and then wanted a funeral celebrating his rebellion, then that would be wrong too.  I admire your passion here but your reasoning is not too solid here. 

That being said, if I had made the mistake of opening the door, I would have offered to at least pay for or part of a facility that would make more sense.  As for people applauding, think figure of speech here people.

Hard call to make, but as a pastor who wants to represent Jesus to a group of people who are most likely “lost,” I think I would do two things:

<OL>
<LI>Go through with the original commitment that was made to the family. Allow the funeral. Explain to the congregation that we are people of our word and that while we do not endorse all that will happen, we see it as an opportunity to do what Jesus did: to be “a friend of sinners” (of this particular variety) with no strings attached.

<LI> Create a better policy, etc. to avoid the situation in the future (for example, “no funerals in our building that are not officiated by our staff.").

</OL>
Of course, having written this from the comfort of my living room easy chair and not actually being in the heat of the moment and having to make the call THEN ... maybe that’s why this site is called Monday Morning Insight?

Grace and peace to all ...

Leonard,

I apologize if my comment came across that all fat people are gluttons. Heck, I’m fat myself, so Mr. Pot, meet Mr. Kettle. I’m sorry about that.

I don’t know how you can “celebrate” homosexuality. How do you promote homosexuality? I think people are blowing this way out of proportion JUST BECAUSE it’s homosexuality.

Can you imagine homosexuality being glorified in a worship service? I mean, I doubt the speaker stood up there and shouted, “GAY IS THE WAY! JESUS WAS GAY! WE NEED TO BE GAY! HIGH POINT IS GAY! THIS MAN WAS GAY! GOOOOO GAY!”

I’m sure it would have been acknowledged that he was gay, just as it would be acknowledged at my funeral that I love food. Or that I have done some screwed up things in my past.

Plus no one is taking into consideration the fact that the family (and the visiting pastor) would have probably respected the churches beliefs on where they stand and not openly proclaimed homosexuality as “the way, the truth and the life.” I would be interested to hear how the service went, and exactly what was said.

Again, Leonard, I didn’t mean to offend with my post regarding fat vs. gluttony. My apologies.

Hey Leonard,

Just so you know, in regard to your prior comment, if you read the full article, the church did offer to pay for a different facility.  So it looks like you’re in agreeance there.

Leonard,

I guess that’s where my problem is. I feel like this issue is being magnified JUST BECAUSE it is homosexuality. I don’t feel like many churches would care if it was some other sin. I feel like too many people feel homosexuality is worse than the others, just because it’s homosexuality.

I’ve been a part of a church that has celebrated the life of someone who loved to party. That wasn’t the focus of the service, and I think it’s a bit of a stretch to say that everyone there was celebrating homosexuality—they were celebrating his life...not the fact that he was gay. And therein lies the problem that I have.

I don’t believe for one moment that the intention of the family was to celebrate homosexuality, or the gay lifestyle. They were just wanting to remember their friend, brother, cousin, who was gay.

Why is that so wrong?

Leonard,
I agree...well said.

From what I’ve read, it sounds like this situation was handled in a very God glorifying manner.  The church honored it’s commitment by offering to pay for an alternative site to host the funeral, while not compromising it’s own principles.  I think this church can be held up as an example.

Seriously, do you think the church would have (or should have) passed on a funeral if there were pictures of the deceased kissing a “partner” that they were not married to?