Why Johnny College Isn’t Coming to Church
- Posted by: Todd
- Posted on: Mon, July 27, 2009
- Viewed 116
- (48) comments so far
4. They have work responsibilities that keep them from attending (23%);
5. They moved too far from church (22%);
6. They just got too busy, even though they’d still like to attend (22%);
7. They didn’t feel connected to the church in the first place (20%);
8. They disagreed with the church’s political/social stance (18%);
9. They decided to spend more time with friends (17%);
10. They were just going to church to please their parents (17%).
That is some interesting information. I’d love to see how this meshes with the reasons that older adults leave the church. I think there are similarities, regardless of age.
One of the biggest reasons adults give for dropping out of church is that they feel people in the church are judgmental and hypocritical. Another reason often given is work responsibilities. And then there are those who just want a break, others who have moved and haven’t reconnected with a new church, or are just too busy. And these days, many of us disagree with the church’s political and/or social views.
And just going to church to please your parents? Well that’s still a good excuse, no matter your age. Except maybe it’s your spouse, or another family member you’re aiming to please.
Why do people leave your church? No, really. Why do people leave? Think of the last 5 families that have left your church. Do you even know why they left? And did you or anyone discuss their decision with them after they left?
Young people AND adults leave churches for the silliest reasons. Sometimes a gentle prodding or talk can rescue them from their inactivity in the church. Sometimes not. But too often, we just let them go. We allow their laziness or lousy reasoning to keep them from our or any church, and stand by as they distance themselves from the One who wants, more than anything, to have a day-by-day relationship with them.
Is there someone you should call today to say, “Hey, how are you doing? I’ve been missing you?”
Thanks, and have a great week! You can email me at .
Todd
Recently, my friend Ed Stetzer gave a presentation at the International Christian Retail Show on some of the research he's doing at LifeWay. He shared the top reasons they've found that young adults are dropping out of church these days. Among the reasons:
1. They simply want a break from church (27%);
2. They felt church members are judgmental and/or hypocritical (26%);
3. They moved to college and didn't find another church (25%);
Comments
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Billy Cox on Fri, July 31, 2009
Leonard asked:
“Is there a group of people you meet with for the express purpose to disciple them?”
Based on the most common definition of ‘disciple’, my answer is ‘no’. The disciples were not Jesus’ projects, they were his friends…he even says so in John 15:15.
Look back at the survey results and consider how many of the ten reasons have something to do with connection/relationship or the lack thereof.
Isn’t it odd then that we think of discipleship primarily as transmitting orthodoxy, churchmanship, and spiritual disciplines? Those things are important, but without connection/love, it’s all rubbish.
Leonard on Fri, July 31, 2009
Billy, the disciples became his friends, they were followers first. Jesus statement was I no longer call you slaves but friends. What did he call them before that… servants, students, disciples… They also saw themselves as students.
You set up a false dichotomy here. There is no mention of Jesus projects. Simeple questioin. Are we making disciples? Do we have a clear understanding of the person we want to develop?
I meet with several guys: here is what I want to see happen in their lives.
I want to teach them to
1) Love God
2) Love others
3) Love the Word of God
4) Love the church
5) Love God’s mission in the world.
We spend anywhere from a year to 3 years, along the way we restore marriage relationships, teach better parenting, communication, service, ministry, doctrine and theology, trusting God, endurance… All these guys end up serving in the local church as a leader who develops other leaders. Some over the years have gone into ministry vocationally, most do not.
I think if we are talking about discipling but not actually doing it, well we know what that makes us don’t we? Seminary professors. : )
It is totally relationship driven, is time consuming, about 15 hours a week for me, but I would not trade it. I have no greater joy than to see/hear my children walk in truth.
Got a note from a couple I discipled a week ago. In it they said, thank you for teaching us to love God and the church. We serve every week, read our bibles daily to deepen our friendship with Christ and are trying to get our neighbors to come to church.
That was caught and taught. So is there anyone we are actively discipling or are we just talking about it?
MK on Sat, August 01, 2009
I have been reading through some of the replies here and am concerned with some of the banter about mere words/jargon that is ultimately unprofitable in regards to the Gospel, which is the matter truly at stake here…Consider Paul’s admonitions in 2 Timothy.
Pastors and other servants, I applaud your heart and your hard work—may you be blessed. Continue to seek His Word and listen to His Spirit—no one else. Time is short—very, very short—and much is at stake.
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